u/Friendly_Pepper2786

I dont know how I got in. I was very surprised! I got some books by that For Dummies group, but my ADD wont let me read them. Please tell me the tips and tricks! I am so nervous because I have so many other classes, which will fill up my schedule, so math being easy for me will help a lot! I haven't done geometry in awhile, but I was good at it. Algebra comes easy to me, but that doesnt mean that I know everything! My teacher said that she thinks I can do it, which I guess I should listen to her, but I am soooo nervous! Anything helps! Thank you!!!

I am just curious to see what other like

I am just curious to see what others think

I have tried praying the Rosary, reading the Bible, and everything else that people tell me to do, but I just feel numb.

I believe in God. I believe in Jesus. I believe in the Trinity. I believe Jesus died for me and wants a relationship with me. I don't doubt any of that. I just don't feel anything anymore, and it makes me so sad because I want to have the relationship with God that other people seem to have.

When I was younger, I had a really bad relationship with my dad. I'm not going to go into everything that happened, but his side of the family constantly used Jesus against me. They would say things like, "Jesus loves your father, so why don't you?" It made me feel like God chose my dad over me. I know now that isn't true, and I don't blame God for anything that happened, but I wonder if all of that made me emotionally shut down.

My mom has been my rock through everything. I know God has blessed me so much, and I want to thank Him for that, but I just feel so emotionally flat.

I used to cry when I thought about Jesus carrying the cross. Now I just think, "That happened," and I hate that. I used to be so excited to receive the Eucharist. I even refused to eat beforehand because I wanted to receive Jesus with as much respect as possible. When i recived him i felt like i ate a whole rotisserie chicken. Now I don't even go to Mass as often as I should, even though I really want to get back into the habit.

One thing I have never forgotten is a dream I had in fourth grade. I dreamed that Mary appeared to me. She was the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She had a peaceful smile and folded hands. She was looking at me, then closed her eyes like she was praying for me. Was she praying for me? The next night I dreamed about Jesus. I was witnessing the disciples trying to catch fish and jesus on the water. He was lit up loke gold in the storm. A week later I had another dream where I was in Heaven and God sent a letter asking me to joing him. Thst one was shprt, but rather weird to me for some reasom. I have no idea what those dreams meant, but they have stayed with me ever since.

I also have a golden retriever named Walter. I used to be severely allergic to dogs, but somehow my allergy disappeared. Having him has helped me understand, just a tiny bit, how much God loves us. I love Walter so much, but I want to love God even more than that.

I just want to feel alive again. I want to love God with my whole heart, and I don't know why I feel so numb.

Has anyone else gone through this? How did you rebuild your relationship with God? Any advice would really mean a lot. I just want to have the relationship I once had with god.