u/GenZforChrist

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I was born in a Christian spirit-filled church that had prophecies about great things. I am 27 now, and my life is miserable. I am emotionally numb and in darkness. Also, the fact that I desired to marry a girl, was socially shy, and kinda was friend-zoned. I am not attractive; I am average at best. I only got the height of 6’ 1” and strength to my advantage. I now wake up constantly raging at God. I feel sick of the idea of God even existing. I wish I could help people that suffer, but I can’t even help myself. The thing is, it is getting worse now. I am hoping technology can solve this type of depression and apathy because I hear nothing from God. Who is going to make God do anything? Can a petition from all the universe even force God to change, as he is either withdrawn or is cold in nature? How many countless people suffered like me or worse for thousands of years? How can this reality not go unchecked? I prayed. I tried. Where is his hand? How isn’t his ignorance to helpless beings like me not an evil act on its own? He allowed a weapon of mass destruction (the devil) to reign supreme. Now he also judges us, the weak. This isn’t a game; this is our lives. RIP to all that never made it. I wish I could save them, but I am only one man in flesh. Now people will say Jesus is the way. Some of you don’t understand. We tried Jesus, and it got even worse. All I am saying is sure he’s the way, so why won’t he act then?