u/Glittering_Click2424

Please help I am stressed.

So I am a junior in college. I'm trying to go straight through without a gap year if I am able to, and have been planning with that in mind.

Issue: two of my main recommendations have fallen through (one on sabbatical the other maternity leave; first hasn't been responding to emails for months and the latter has essentially said she really wants me to get in and doesn't think that she has the bandwidth to write a solid one for this cycle given the upcoming new baby. One has had me for 2 years worth of classes, the other for just under a year worth. These rec losses are devastating especially because the one that has known me a year wrote me a strong enough rec for 3 yesses for internships).

Here's what other things are looking like if I apply this year:

MCAT score not back yet (releases May 12th) I am expecting something in the low-mid 510s (conservatively). I would be shocked if I scored over a 517.

AMCAS GPA: 3.83, sGPA: 3.72

If I decide to apply, I'll be taking Casper and PREview later this month.

\~1600 research hours at one lab in a premier cancer institution, no publications yet but won a competitive school research scholarship for it (100 awardees for research in a 45k pool of undergraduates) and will be presenting my research in an oral talk at the symposium.

Have also been a part of what is essentially a research program where you're paired with a mentor in a field of interest and you read papers with them and learn about an area you are interested in. Gave two talks as part of this reviewing literature I had covered through this program at symposiums at the end of the quarters. Was probs about 170 hours.

360ish volunteer hours in radiation oncology department of a premier cancer institution

180 hours volunteering as a lecture assistant (peer facilitator)

Maybe 40 ish hours volunteering in a tutoring program with refugee/housing insecure populations. Plan to continue this

40ish hours spread out into a few other volunteering efforts - making kits for kids with cancer, some science advocacy for women by setting up tabling at some events, etc.

60 hours shadowing an internist

1300 hours of fundraising/volunteering + raised 60k for a national blood cancer fundraiser since HS through til now

200 hours as vp and co-pres (promoted midyear)

Fairly weak letters (if I can even get enough). One back up stem prof who has technically only had me for a quarter, a religions prof who has also known me for a quarter, my PI, the physician I shadowed, my rad onc coordinator. No idea who to even ask for another stem rec letter.

Now when we take next year into account it suddenly gets a lot better

I can count on those two recommendations as one of those professors has had me as student + PF for 6 quarters, the second already wrote one for internships, and my back up letter suddenly becomes super strong because I will PF for that professor and am likely to be joining his lab as well. Plus may get one from my mentor for the summer, and all three volunteer coords, on top of the physician that is writing this year, and my current PI. I could either take another course with the relig prof, or try and get another class with my med anthro prof who was super sweet.

Plus, doing an NIH funded summer internship w/ the director of medicine at the school I will be at as my mentor (so potentially a rec letter from there as well as my current mentor) at about 400 hours total + a second symposium

400 more hours + solo president of the club I'm running

Dual Departmental Honors in my two majors + theses for both of them

Will be able to add about 20k from this year and whatever amount we're at next year to my fundraising total + 500 more hours to that

More shadowing over the summer (know of a few docs who may be willing).

200 more hours at radiation oncology

200 more hours at a new research lab (plus can join a rare group of double awardees for the scholarship + a second symposium, I know he's put several undergrads through for it)

180 more peer facilitator hours

Tutoring will be closer to 100 hours, making it longitudinal rather than what seems like something i randomly started (I got the idea because of a teaching biology class, wish I had started sooner).

Plus, can complete a certification this summer and look for jobs for my gap year and show anticipated clinical hours there.

\^ that's something super weak for me, I don't really have a lot of pure patient interaction stories.

The lack of letter of recs (I have a random religions prof I had for one quarter MAYBE writing one, plus the prof I'd be joining for research only had me in his class 1 quarter) and not knowing my MCAT score is really sending me. I don't want to apply to schools I don't wanna go to just to protect myself from reapplicant bias in case I don't get in this cycle.

I also don't know ANY juniors applying straight through, and I am first gen in the US + first gen med-aspirant so I am having to figure all of this out myself. I'm so stressed with the deadlines getting closer and closer. Help please 😭

It's been three years here and I am starting to get kind of annoyed about how unreliable many professors are. I understand that they are busy and their jobs have many components. But their students depend on them.

I don't know if they don't realize the extent to which this is true or what but I am starting to get really frustrated at how infrequently many professors respond to their emails, if at all.

I have emailed multiple professors recently about different things and sent follow ups (for one, I have been trying to follow up and even tried to hunt them down physically since JANUARY) to no response. Time sensitive matters? No response. Promised to write an LOR, told you to talk to them when it is only a month out but now that it's time to reach out to them? No response. Problem happened with taking exam? No response!

To the point that due to bad communication from my professors, I may not have enough LORs for my applications for grad school due to some not responding despite verbal agreements, and others last minute bailing after agreeing without giving me time to find back ups.

I had a friend who had to drop a course because the professor didn't get back to her about her not being able to make it to the final for the ENTIRE QUARTER and she ended up with a 0 on it!

It's really exhausting and frankly really demoralizing. I know that there's a lot of talk out there about how our generation never grew up and things like that. But I feel like this is a lack of conferring basic respect to an adult regarding their time, career, and life.

Just ugh. The more and more I deal with this crap, the more I'm turned off from the entirety of academia. I've heard of PIs not submitting important things until minutes before for no good reason, leaving people on tenterhooks about publications too. What is it with academic culture that lets these things happen????

Edit: I just feel like these things have consequences in almost every other field. I just don't understand why its so pervasive in academia and why people can get away with this kind of thing.