u/GroundbreakingFig465

we’ve already been dating for years. having sex and living together. we’re now new believers. not married. do we stop?

it’s a lot but i’m female, 33, sober 5 months and saved 3 months. i’m very disciplined and motivated in my relationship with the Lord. i’ve always been a very 0-100 person. hence how i ended up an alcoholic probably 😂

my boyfriend and i have dated off and on since we were kids. but we’ve been consistently together, living together etc 2 years now.
he had a hard time, kept getting caught betraying me with drugs and we split.
he’s watched my journey and was inspired to get sober and got saved also. so we’re working it out.

he’s not as good at indulging immediately into the prayer life, worship, etc. he’s very shy and thinks it’s all a little overwhelming and has lots of questions still which is fine. his baby steps are noticed.

i keep wondering if God even wants this relationship for me. or He wanted me out. and then wondered if we do work it out, if God wants us to just…stop having sex even though we’ve been already doing it?

it’s all a little overwhelming for me to think about.
part of me is like Gods using this relationship to teach me forgiveness, compassion etc. because i am. normally i’d just split and run. but i understand him, and grew up with him.
but then i think WHAT IF?! it’s a lot. any thoughts from more seasoned believers? be gentle!

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u/GroundbreakingFig465 — 6 days ago

i don’t get how jesus is helping me do anything

i’m a baby christian. and very analytical and literal. so i have a hard time hearing things like “jesus will give you the strength to get out of this”

“there’s healing in jesus”

“jesus got me through it”

i do not feel jesus anywhere around. i do not obviously hear from him. i do all the right things, i pray all the time, i read my bible about an hour a day, podcasts, church, bible study. all the things go get plugged in and try to connect with god.

yet i feel frustrated, stupid, and confused.
i’m a recovering alcoholic, and everyone keeps saying things like “ask god to remove your selfish desires and addiction”. i do this all the time and still think about just giving up and going back 😂 i do not understand how all of this isn’t just me self helping and slapping jesus on it. but i want nothing more than to feel whatever everyone is feeling and to see what im missing and be whole.

thanks 🥲

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u/GroundbreakingFig465 — 1 month ago