Toddler Repeatedly Saying They Don’t Want a Nanny
Context: Our toddler is almost three, DB and I both WFH. Toddler is medically complex, and daycare is not possible. Before having a nanny, MB was toddler’s caretaker full time for about 2 years. Toddler has had a nanny for about six months, 5 days a week.
Every day they cry and even scream when we hand them over to nanny for outdoor time in the morning. One day they actually fell/tripped over my leg trying to get back in the house, bc they didn’t want to go outside with nanny. We had nanny switch to playing inside first in the morning, and going outside a little later, which helped a bit but still sometimes led to prolonged crying and toddler bursting into the home office. It’s also nicer weather in the morning for outside play.
Toddler screams and cries if nanny tries to put them down for a nap - over half hour, so DB or MB will take time to do this instead of subjecting our nanny to the screaming. Toddler will eat lunch with nanny fine most days.
Our current nanny is moving away, so we are looking to hire a new nanny. I’m dreading the screaming and have been trying to prepare toddler for the idea that a new person is coming, telling her she is a teacher (which is true) and will play with her. Our toddler says no, they don’t want that, they only want Mama and Papa, and they don’t want her in our house (literally told me this). I said we need to meet her first, because we don’t know if we like her yet. Toddler repeated they don’t want her in the house and only wants us, starting to cry. She is not like this about family, friends and other people who have been in her life since she was a baby. She loves having them over.
Given the daily crying and screaming we are subjected to with the current nanny for six months now, how reasonable is it to think this may improve and work out with a new nanny? I would think even if we put up with the situation, most nannies would run away from this job, right? Does anyone have experience making a majorly Velcro/barnacle child come around?
Thank you for reading and for any advice.