Losing my dream job and how this will affect me as a new grad.
I’m posting this because I am at an absolute rock bottom and need some perspective from people who understand the nursing world. I was recently fired from my dream New Grad Residency program. The reason given was "requirements not met," but the actual cause was clock in issues. To be transparent: I was clocking hours in a way that I believed was consistent with hospital policy, but my manager wanted them clocked in a very specific, different way. The hardest part to swallow is that I wasn't the only one doing this. Several other nurses were clocking their time the exact same way. However, my manager chose only to take action against me.
I want to be clear, I am not making excuses. I know this is 100% my fault. I should have been more diligent and ensured I was following her specific expectations. I have learned this lesson the hardest way possible. I lost my passion and my dream start in this career because I wasn't careful enough with administrative details.
What makes this so painful is that clinically, I was thriving. I received stellar ratings from my preceptors, who consistently noted my dedication. I put every ounce of effort into being a safe nurse by constantly educating myself, asking for feedback, and immediately applying it. Even the doctors and NPs on the unit told me I was one of the few new grads they’ve met that they weren't afraid of because they could see how hard I was working to be a well-rounded, safe clinician. My preceptors can speak very highly of my bedside skills and work ethic. My husband is (understandably) very upset. He feels I did something I shouldn't have done, and the guilt of letting my family down is eating me alive.
I’m struggling with my future employment related questions. My termination letter just says "requirements not met." Will this blackball me from other reputable hospital systems? How do I explain this in future interviews without sounding like I’m blaming my manager? Has anyone else survived a termination during residency? How do I move forward and convince a recruiter that I am a safe, dedicated nurse who made administrative mistake? Will I ever get a job again where I want to be?