taking time taking life
this is my first attempt at poetry and i wanted to share it and hopefully get some criticism and feedback.
some background information, in march i tried to take my own life and i felt alone and lost, the next day i woke up and ny first thought was how could i do that to the people who love me. i didn’t think about myself or what happened to me, all i could think about was everyone who cared about me. i felt like i had to get it out of my system and this was the first thing i came up with:
one day ill wake up
the trees will blow in the wind
the birds will chirp
the grass will have grown
but it will be quiet, lonley
the next day ill wake up
ill brush my teeth
get dressed
get the bus
but the quiet is loud, screaming
a week later i might not
but the treas will still blow
the bird will still chirp
and the grass will still grown
but the quiet is gone, but so am i
other mums will wake up
feed their boys
iron their clothes
pack their bags
but not mine, not now
dads all around will go to work
placing bricks
making money
eating lunch
but not mine, not now
brothers and sisters will go to school
maths and english
break and lunch
homework and detentions
but not mine, not not now
dogs and cats will greet their owners
barking ans purring
being fed and loved
stroked and squeezed
but not mine, not now
others words will move on
theyll get their jobs
marry their soulmates
have their kids
but not me, not now
time will stop
for me
for us
but nor for them
theyll keep moving, on and on
the trees will blow
the birds will chirp
and the grass will grow
but i wont see it happen
because ive took something not worth taking
please let me know your thoughts on it because since i wrote this ive felt calmer and overalls better about myself and its something inwant to carry on doing and improving on. thank you.