This post has no names etc & is completely anonymous for obvious reasons.
I am currently training & love my placement school.
Although, there is a TA who I’ve noticed carries a particular tone when talking to me.
We were asked to cover walls for examinations - fine. I was tired & admit I was doing it in a bit of a round the houses way.
Then TA comes over ‘The way you’re doing this is giving me so much anxiety’ and narrows eyes & wavers hands in air.
I thought to myself it was ‘off’, I walked over to another TA who I get along well with who also does not seem to have much to do with particular TA. At the time, she gave me ‘the eye’ as if to say ‘huh’ when it happened. Then she said ‘That was unnecessary, it’s not helping anyone’.
I ask my mentor for a word & simply say ‘I am tired & might have misconstrued it, but I would like to speak to X, is that appropriate?’.
They then say I can speak to TA alone, so I do. I start by stating ‘I thought earlier the tone was a bit off, but I am tired & might have misinterpreted it, have I done anything recently to annoy you that you would like to discuss?’.
They then say I was setting off their anxiety & they can be a bit OCD, I said ‘I completely get it, you might not have noticed, but I completely refuse to walk by bins as it sets me off’.
Then they said it’s just how they speak & I said ‘I appreciate that, but I think open communication & neutralised language /tone is important at work, perhaps we can work on talking to eachother in a middle ground’.
I said ‘I would have found it more useful if you came over and just said ‘Hey you can do it xyz way’. And said ‘I am training, I might not be perfect, but I’m trying my best & not being paid’.
She said ‘If I see you doing something stupid I am going to tell you’.
Then convo progressed and I basically said ‘I think we need to remember we are people & we might be tired or have personal life events’.
TA follows up with ‘Yeah, don’t tell me I don’t want to know’ to which I replied with ‘I wasn’t going to tell you about my personal life anyways’.
TA then said ‘You would know if I didn’t like you because I would speak to (mentor name) & refuse to speak to you directly’.
Then she mentions my ‘eyes’ & said she basically dislikes them & doesn’t think I always communicate respectfully.
To which I was shocked and said ‘I am really sorry what is bothering you? And how can I fix it?’
She said ‘I am not going to tell you’ and rolled her eyes.
After school she is speaking to mentor & I’m panicked as to how this will effect placement as I love all the staff & school, but I just noticed this theme & did not want to tolerate being spoken to in a certain way. I thought I handled it professionally - advise.