i need help regarding hpv.
Hi everyone, i don’t usually post on reddit but i’m at the point that i don’t know what else to do so pls reddit do ur thing n help me. Sorry in advance for the long post. I’m a 22 year old male. Bi. I have had sexual encounters with many men but i’m still a virgin (no penetration).
I recently about a week or so ago noticed a few bumps in my groin area..at first i thought they were just the hair follicles acting up maybe..and after shaving i noticed there were like 5 of them. I didn’t panic cuz i just thought the hair follicle was inflamed. I went to my regular gp for something else but mentioned this and after examining, he said it’s probably hpv.
I was shocked. I have always been very careful and recently i have been going through a lot so this just made me feel so defeated on top of everything else going on in my life. I feel..violated? Disgusted? Ashamed? Like a failure? Anyway, i had multiple breakdowns over this. I wasn’t the most educated on hpv itself tbh and have learnt a lot the last few days. Now i’m upset because men can’t even get tested for it but i do my tests regularly and i wish my doctor had mentioned to me to get the hpv vaccine anyway.
The doctor advised me to get a second opinion ideally with a dermatologist. Unfortunately, all dermatologists are booked till June. So, i did book one to be on a waitlist and i also booked an appointment with a sexual health clinic for next week to get an official confirmation on whether or not i even have it. But..based off the warts..i feel like it is. The warts itself aren’t big at all thank God but yeah.
Now i’m stuck in an anxious loop. I feel..like I’ve been stripped away of my sexiness, sensuality, etc and am different from others? One thing about me, I’m a very emotional and sensitive person. And I also have a fuckin hemmoroid and now this shit on top of it. So, I just..am so lost..I’m trying to get clarity. Other people’s stories on tik tok and here have helped and I’ve learnt that it can go away or the body can suppress it at least in 1-3 years and to take care of your immune system is really important etc. and apparently 80-85% of people get it at some point in their lives? I will be getting the vaccine and I know liquid nitrogen helps. But..I don’t know what else to do. My doctor said I will have to live with this? And that just broke my heart. He said when your immune system goes down, the warts can flare up again potentially but besides that, you should be fine? idk.
Also, this part confuses me, if I get my treatment and am fine after and like a few months pass, do I still have to view it as a “current” problem or a “past” problem? Like can I just move on with my life or no? 😭😭 Would I have to disclose it to future partners/hookups even if I don’t have warts etc? That part scares me cuz I feel like most people would just reject you but obviously I would let them know but I want to know when I’m fine, do I still have to mention it? I can’t even really think of dating or whatever cuz I’m like..how do I move on from this? Whenever I see someone cute in person or online, I just immediately think of my issue and feel down. I don’t know. Can someone just please tell me everything’s gonna be alright? 😭😭