u/JeannieJoy

As described in another thread, my mother was admitted to the hospital with decompensated liver cirrhosis (presumably alcohol-related). Since she won't and can't give me any answers (HE), I keep wondering how long she's been an alcoholic without me noticing. She must have had compensated cirrhosis for quite some time. What are your experiences? How long does one drink before reaching this condition? I know for sure that she's been drinking hard liquor since December 2025, but now I think it was much longer.. Thank you for your experience.

I'm feeling completely overwhelmed and don't know what the next step should be for my mom, because i don't know what to expect.

She broke up with her Partner and moved back into a small village, shortly after her move she did not feel well and went to her doctor who send her to the hospital. At this time we did not know whats going on. It turned out (bit by bit) she has end-stage liver disease (Child-Pugh C) and was hospitalized with hepatic encephalopathy, kidney failure, ascites, pleural effusions and an infection. She was an alcoholic and we did not know about it! I found vodka bottles while i cleaned her appartment while she was hospitalized, i would not have believed it otherwise.

She survived and was discharged home about 3 weeks ago. The problem is that after her stay in the hospital she barely functions at home.

She lives alone because she wanted to move to be close to her friends. Unfortunately, she now doesn't even want those friends to know how sick she is. My brother and I live about 1,5 hrs away (both without car).

A home nursing service comes every day (sometimes more than once) to give medication and check on her. We're also arranging additional support for shopping and household tasks. My brother and I visit several times a week.

But despite all of that, she has barely left her bed since coming home. She gets dizzy when she tries to stand up, hardly eats or drinks, and sleeps or dozes most of the day. Sometimes she doesn't answer her phone for days because she either can't manage it or seems too confused. She recently called me at 4:45 a.m. and was speaking complete nonsense. The next day she seemed a bit better again.

Her family doctor ordered blood tests and recommended home physiotherapy, but otherwise basically told us to encourage her to eat and drink. The problem is... nobody is there 24/7 to make sure she actually does.

We asked if she'd consider moving closer to us, but she refuses. She says she just wants to get stronger and go back to normal. But to be honest for me it looks like she is going to die. She went from being a relatively normal person — l depressed, but still herself — to a complete shell of who she used to be within just a few weeks. She can’t even go to the bathroom on her own anymore, and the hardest part for me is that she is no longer herself at all. The things she says often don’t make any sense because of the hepatic encephalopathy, and it’s heartbreaking to watch someone you know change so drastically.

I honestly don't know what we're supposed to do next.