After 5 days of small talk, a new acquaintance demands I’m available to him all the time everyday– Chinese culture?
5 days ago, I (F) started talking to this Chinese guy on a language exchange app. Sometimes I’m online and we do real-time back and forth. But I don’t reply quickly all the time, I’d disappear and reappear the next day, I don’t announce I’m leaving the conversation, etc. -This is very common in the US. I’m naturally not available all day because I have life outside these conversations.
From the first conversation, I noticed that he wants me to reply to him right away all day. If I don’t, he asks me questions like if I was busy, tired, what my work schedule is like, if I were talking to other people, etc. It seems he was expecting me to be talking to him constantly every day.
Then he sent me these messages out of the blue. I was shocked by his demands that I needed to be available to him all the time or explain my absence because we’re “friends.” I consider him just an acquaintance because our interaction has been 5 days of intermittent small talk online. I put a lot of effort into our conversation (try to be friendly and warm, sharing with him stories and pictures, which he doesn’t do), but apparently that’s not enough. He felt clingy and seemed entitled to my time.
Another thing that bothers me is he’s manipulative despite his seemingly very polite tone;
-Guil-tripping- “If you don’t do what I want, you’re a bad friend /bad person”
-Ultimatum, threat – “If you don’t do what I want, I will punish you by ending contact”
Can this be partly explained by the Chinese culture; Is there anything I'm missing? Did I do somethign wrong? I’d love to hear your thoughts 😊
BTW, I asked him about his age thinking he was very young. But he’s 41.