Should I move across the world to just not get killed by my father?
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I’m a 23-year-old Indian MBBS student trying to decide between staying in India for NEET-PG or pursuing USMLE and moving to the US. While NEET-PG is easier, not complicated and less risky financially, the USMLE offers something much more important to me: freedom and safety.
I come from an abusive, extremely controlling household. My father is violent, manipulative, and has controlled every aspect of my life since childhood—from forcing me into medicine to policing basic things like my WhatsApp profile picture. I’ve spent my whole life pretending to be the “good daughter” because I grew up watching him abuse my mother and fearing what he might do to me if I resisted.
If I stay in India, I fear I’ll never truly escape his control, no matter how successful I become. Moving to the US feels like my only real chance at independence, safety, and living life on my own terms because since US visa is very tough to get, they can’t just come to USA and harm me even if they want to. But I’m conflicted about whether it’s wrong to make such a major career decision primarily as a way to escape abuse rather than purely for professional ambition.
I’m looking for advice from people who escaped controlling or abusive families—about how they planned their freedom, protected themselves, and built independent lives safely.