u/Like_A-Shadow

Is it fair to assume that if a monk speaks about dhamma very little, and when they do, it's mostly shallow or superficial, but they talk a lot about being inspired by other monks, or they talk a lot about non-dhamma things and trivial stuff, they likely aren't practicing or meditating very much? Even when asked direct questions on dhamma topics, they give surface level or generic advice.

I don't want to be too judgemental or harsh, but how should lay people guage whether listening to or being around particular monastics could benefit us on our own paths? I do get that meditation isn't everything, but I also observe these monks engaging in a lot of idle chatter amongst themselves and lay people. Maybe my image of a "good monk" is a little too idealistic.

Hi everyone. A few years ago I hit a turning point in my practice. I had been dating, but couldn't get "into it" like before. I saw how I and the other person were just running through our scripts, playing out the same old act in order to impress each other and get what we wanted from the other person or hope for relationship. I went on several dates with several men. Nothing was wrong with any of them, I just had lost any spark or interest because I was seeing what we were doing in such a different and more objective kind of way. My own inner mental patterns were the most eye opening. At some point I just gave up because I knew I couldn't force myself to take to romantic relationships anymore.

Well fast forward a few years into where I am now. I've stopped attending to my appearance, and I've also dropped my lifelong habit/obsession with fitness, maintaining a certain weight, and optimizing my health. I know that the motivation for this was coming from wanting external validation from others (and most especially potential romantic partners). That motivation isn't there anymore, and I've yet to be able to find a wholesome way to motivate myself to look after my health.

I see this as possibly a deeper issue, and a reflection on how much I do or don't care about myself, am willing to show up for myself, and build my self esteem without factoring in other people's opinions of me. I'm also aware that I'm going into my older years (I'm 39) and should try to maintain my physical mobility, strength, and zeal so I can have the potential to practice dhamma for a longer time. How can I cultivate wholesome motivation to build a habit of exercise and healthy eating? As it stands now, I'm overweight, unfit, and need to clean up my food choices.

Hi everyone. A few years ago I hit a turning point in my practice. I had been dating, but couldn't get "into it" like before. I saw how I and the other person were just running through our scripts, playing out the same old act in order to impress each other and get what we wanted from the other person or hope for relationship. I went on several dates with several men. Nothing was wrong with any of them, I just had lost any spark or interest because I was seeing what we were doing in such a different and more objective kind of way. My own inner mental patterns were the most eye opening. At some point I just gave up because I knew I couldn't force myself to take to romantic relationships anymore.

Well fast forward a few years into where I am now. I've stopped attending to my appearance, and I've also dropped my lifelong habit/obsession with fitness, maintaining a certain weight, and optimizing my health. I know that the motivation for this was coming from wanting external validation from others (and most especially potential romantic partners). That motivation isn't there anymore, and I've yet to be able to find a wholesome way to motivate myself to look after my health.

I see this as possibly a deeper issue, and a reflection on how much I do or don't care about myself, am willing to show up for myself, and build my self esteem without factoring in other people's opinions of me. I'm also aware that I'm going into my older years (I'm 39) and should try to maintain my physical mobility, strength, and zeal so I can have the potential to practice dhamma for a longer time. How can I cultivate wholesome motivation to build a habit of exercise and healthy eating? As it stands now, I'm overweight, unfit, and need to clean up my food choices.

Do you think, given everything the Buddha stood for and the rules he laid down for monks and nuns, that if he were alive today, he would prohibit monastics from owning smartphones?

Is the practice of using the "buddho" mantra something done when the Buddha was still alive, or did it come much later?