u/Mammoth-Patient-9635

Two months ago, I made a post (linked below) about cis/trans men wearing fragrances marketed to women, and vice versa.

https://www.reddit.com/r/fragrance/s/fdr7uXIRml

So many of you gave me AMAZING ideas for fragrances to ignore the gendered marketing, and I tried almost EVERY SINGLE ONE of them that I could find, including many of the vintage frags using Surrender to Chance or Fragrance Vault.

I just felt compelled to follow up now with the VERY exciting news (since I’m sure you’ve been awake nights worrying about what I decided to do 😆) that FOR ME the absolute winners, hands down, by a mile, which are now in regular rotation for me, are…

🖤CHANEL COCO NOIR🖤 and 🖤YSL BLACK OPIUM🖤

Holy Moly! These two make me personally feel so freaking good, so insanely delicious, and my whole family (all very tough critics) absolutely loves me wearing these. On a personal note - I thought I was too old to ever feel slutty again, but in very different ways, these two have basically made me feel like a fuckboy (a term that I don’t think existed when I was younger, and which I never knew could apply to a middle-aged, large, bearded, married guy. TMI?) I love it. 🤷🏻‍♂️😆

Runners up for me from your comments and suggestions have been 🧡Shalimar (all flankers, new and vintage), 🥀 Chanel No. 5 (EDP and especially Eau Premiere), and the vintage 🍃 Miss Dior … all absolutely sensational!!!

Thanks to everyone for the phenomenal recommendations!!! I had an amazing two months exploring.

Hey all. What percentage of resale bottles is in your collection? Do you have any rules for yourself about new vs used? Can you look at your used bottles with the same affection as your retail bottles?

Why I’m asking…

I had a collection of around 50 bottles that I really loved, made up of 30 retail/discounter bottles, and 20 bought second-hand (or third, fourth…) from the main resale sites of used items that we all know, always from very reputable sellers. And even with all my criteria for choosing sellers (5 star ratings, zero mentions of fakes in reviews) I STILL ended up buying around 3-4 obvious fakes… the sites refunded me immediately, but it still felt gross. I started side-eyeing the 20 second-hand bottles in my collection, using them less and less, and enjoying them not at all, even though I am 100% certain those 20 bottles were authentic. I just started to hate them. Even though I am 100% sure they were authentic, I couldn’t stop thinking about refills, tampering, the unknowns of how they were stored, etc.

So… I sold all 20 of those bottles (first confirming authenticity and offering buyers refunds if proven fake) and have decided I will only ever get retail/discounter BNIB fragrances from now on. I know it’s more expensive, but I’ve decided I need to be the first and only owner, or I will have lingering doubts and avoid the bottle.

What are your thoughts about all this for yourself?

Hey y’all. I’ll be in LA for a few days with my family and wondering what personal “frag tourism” time I should carve out for myself, if any… I already live in a big city with Saks, Neimans, MFK, Amouage, Dior, Chanel, LV, Le Labo, Dyptique, Hermes, etc. Just wondering about your experiences at these three places (where I will be anyway), and weather they are worth ditching the family for an hour, or nah… THANK YOU!

1. Henry Jacques - this would be entirely educational for me to sniff… I have absolutely NO intention of buying anything there. Is it fun to walk around and sniff and learn? Are things laid out to test independently? Or salespeople follow you? Have to ask for each sniff from bottles behind a counter?

2. Guerlain Spa: anything the Guerlain counters don’t already have at Saks and Neimans? Comfortable to look around if I don’t have a spa appointment?

3. Disneyland (New Orleans Square perfume store): fun experience? Or just another perfume store?

Thanks so much, y’all!

My question is, what are your rules for yourself when it comes to pricing? If you see a bottle you want, how much money would stop you from getting it, and why? What amount of money makes you walk away from a deal that you want?

In the buy/sell/swap groups on Reddit and elsewhere, I see so much haggling over pretty small amounts of money, and I’ve definitely done it myself too. I was recently thinking about how it normally takes me a few years or more to go through one bottle, since I have 20 different fragrances I alternate. I will never remember that $20 (or even $50…) three years from now.

And don’t get me wrong, but even if I spent $300 too much on a bottle to buy it retail from Saks… I know that’s a LOT of money… but I could make it back over the entire life of that bottle (3 years? More?) just by choosing to cook for my family two extra times per year instead of order out for dinner.

For example, I’m a cis man who smells freaking GREAT wearing Miss Dior EDP. My son (9) loves rocking my Kurky, although obviously I don’t let him wear fragrance to school at 9 😆

I know, I know… it’s all a construct and marketing. I agree! I’m just curious if you’re a cis or trans woman who wears something like Sauvage, or a cis or trans man who wears something like Chanel No. 5… I feel like you never hear about these things, but I want to! 🤷🏻‍♂️