u/MeasurementOk9019

I have been a member of the Shinnyo en sanga for three years. I have experienced profound change in my life during that time. I have had some moments of "what am I doing?" occasionally. I have given the practice my all, until now.

In the past year I have had some issues with my "guiding parent", micro aggressions, triangulation with his other guiding children, betrayal of confidence. It has greatly affected my desire to practice. I find my desire dwindling. They tell me bad spirits are influencing me. I am completely torn with leaving. It's embarrassing but I am afraid something bad will happen if I leave. I have done research and found a Zen temple near me.

Any input or guidance would be helpful.