Help with anime cons
So I have been going cons for about since 9th grade that was 4 years ago the first time I went it was fun, cute but as I went on I didn’t really make any friends there which was fine but now that I’m out of school my friends are all gone and when I went to an 18 plus con I have never felt so out of place. And stayed to myself. The problem is there’s one in November (18+) in Colorado but even if I go there the rules that I made for myself is basically keep your head down and eyes down basically don’t do anything so you can’t get in trouble. Because I can’t ever be myself around anyone. Because I’m so different than everyone not just because of my disability. It’s because the way I am I just can’t be myself I feel like I always have to put on a mask on my personality and can’t do anything around the cons.
Please help me and give me some tips