u/MissionComputer976

For context/background:
I grew up in a religious household. Anything not of that religion was considered evil; magic, divination, witchcraft, paranormal, etc. But I've always been a very curious person. I loved anything to do with the supernatural/paranormal. I was obsessed with different mythologies/pantheons. The one that I loved the most was Celtic mythology. About seven years ago, I had heard of the Mórrígan. But I didn't hear anything in detail beyond "death goddess."

About four or five weeks ago, I suddenly had the Mórrígan on my mind 24/7. I woke up? She was there. I went about my day? She was there. I laid down for bed? She was there. I dreamed? She was there, albeit, very unclearly. It looked like the silhouette of a woman in a misty, moonlit forest with a raven nearby, but it was like I was seeing it without my glasses or I was underwater. For several days, I could not escape thinking of her. I did some research, but I didn't know exactly what to look for.

I eventually told my three partners, whom are all pagan/pagan-adjacent. They told me that the Mórrígan could have been calling to me, but that wasn't up to them to say. Eventually, I jokingly said, "Well, if it is her, she'll show me a sign." That same day, literally about ten minutes later, there was a raven in our front yard, staring at me.

I tried to explain it away. Like it was just a coincidence. The lone raven just happened to be there immediately after joking about signs. It just happened to constantly stare at me and not fly away, only hopping a few feet when I got too close. I'm not saying the raven was her. But maybe the coincidence happened for a reason.

Now? I've set up a basic altar with stones, a candle, and some coins that I felt needed to be there because they are long-cherished items of mine. I have a table runner with Celtic symbols on it as well. (I've also been given a tarot deck, but I feel that isn't very relevant right now.)

I am trying to figure out where to go from here. I'm not asking for someone to tell me what to do. Just what are some next steps I can do to strengthen this bond? I am coming into this completely blind. I don't know any history. I don't know most symbols. I've been trying to research. One of my partners actually follows the Mórrígan which I found out afterwards, so I ask them questions. But my relationship with the Mórrígan will most likely be different than theirs.

I am at a point in my life where big changes are happening, which is why I think the Mórrígan has suddenly appeared in my life. I am twenty-nine, I've made discoveries about myself regarding sexuality, gender identity, what I want to do with my life, wanting to be a more confident, stronger, and better person, and I plan to quit bad habits to be healthier.

Where do I go from here? I've been asking my partners for help, but I want multiple perspectives. Any help is welcome. Thank you.