u/No-Green2018

Mock scores neeche hi ja rhe hain😭

This is my first drop year for CLAT, and lately I've been feeling pretty lost. I don't know whether this is just FOMO or whether I'm genuinely struggling with feeling left behind, but I'd really appreciate some honest advice.

Last year, I scored AIR under 7k in CLAT and 121 score in AILET, without any coaching. I come from a village and my circumstances haven't exactly been ideal. I didn't have access to coaching last year, and I've had to figure out a lot of things on my own from a relatively young age. I'm essentially the only member of my immediate family left, so I haven't really had the kind of family support system that many people my age might take for granted.

This year, I've taken the LE test series and moved away from my city, living alone so that I can focus completely on my preparation. Academically, things are actually going quite well. I'm scoring around 80–98 in mocks, and I feel that my preparation is considerably better than last year.

But mentally, I feel very different.

I look around and see people my age having fun, travelling, playing sports, developing different skills, going out, etc. Some people seem genuinely good at something — sports, music, art, socialising, whatever. I feel like I'm not particularly good at anything.

I come from a very different environment, and even my way of speaking and conversation skills feel very "village-like" to me. I have almost zero confidence socially.

I see people going out, dating, partying, smoking, drinking and generally having experiences, and honestly, sometimes I wish I had that kind of life too. It's not really about smoking or drinking. It's more about having people around me, being comfortable socially, having experiences and feeling like I'm actually experiencing my youth.

The problem is that I haven't really had much of a social life.

I've also never really talked to a girl properly, never had a girlfriend, and have basically no idea what my future social or romantic life will look like.

Then there are the smaller things that add to the insecurity. My dressing sense is terrible, I'm extremely overweight, and I don't have the money, time or basic fitness level right now to join a gym. So I feel insecure about my appearance as well.

Sometimes all of this makes me wonder:

Am I wasting my youth by spending another year preparing for an entrance exam?

I know CLAT is important. I know that getting into a good NLU could give me a completely new environment and opportunities to grow as a person. But I'm also scared that I'll reach college and still remain the same socially awkward, insecure person.

I've had to grow up in circumstances that were quite different from those of most people around me, and sometimes I wonder whether I've simply missed out on learning all the normal social things that people my age seem to know naturally.

So I want to ask people who have taken drops, come from difficult backgrounds, or simply started out with very little confidence:

Does life actually get better?

Can someone genuinely change their personality, confidence, social skills, appearance and friendships after 18–20? Can you really build yourself from scratch?

And does life changes after getting into a NLU?

I'm not looking for sympathy. I'd genuinely appreciate honest advice — even if it's harsh.

Thanks for reading.

Scored 91,far better from the previous two.

yaar 2025 Ailet ke exam mein 120.5 aaye the🥲