Is this pregnancy discrimination? Offered a pay off to leave, off the record, (England)
I’m really confused about a situation at work and I’m wondering whether it amounts to pregnancy discrimination, and more generally I’m looking for advice on how to navigate this.
I’ll give full details below, but in summary I’ve been off on stress leave for two months, I’m doing a phased return now with support from OH. OH made some recommendations about how work can help/support my return to work.
I’m pregnant, and I emailed HR, OH, and my manager’s manager on Wednesday to let them know.
I had a meeting with my manager’s manager yesterday (Thursday), and she said they are not willing to do any of the things recommended by OH. She was reading everything off a script, presumably from HR. She said she had an offer for me, that she could share without prejudice and off the record only, did I want to hear it, I agreed. She said they had a pot of money and they would like to offer me some money to leave and would I like to accept it, she didn’t even say how much just would I accept it, I said no. The whole meeting only lasted 6 minutes.
Are they allowed to do this while I’m pregnant? Is this discrimination given I told them I was pregnant the day before? And are they going to keep trying to get rid of me now, what are my rights?
I want to go back on stress leave because I already feel as bad as I did when I left before because of this, I’m having trouble sleeping. But I’m worried that if I go back on stress leave that they’ll try to say I don’t have capability to do my role and get rid of me, can they do that?
Full details:
I started reporting to a new manager in January. He has been promoted over me from a less senior role because the work he looks after is considered to be really important, business critical (I used to look after it before I went on mat leave, returned Sep 2025).
The work I reverted to looking after on return is different, and my new manager has repeatedly told me he knows nothing about it. He has made some objectively bad decisions since managing me, including pausing all of my work then unpausing it the following week, conducting my private 121s in the open plan office after saying he wasn’t comfortable recording them because they are private, and giving really unrealistic deadlines for work to be completed. He actually asked me if I had finished a task after I’d been off sick for two days, I was like no? I’ve been off sick? You know this?
He doesn’t have any other reports, I’m his only employee.
After all of the issues I was having I asked my doctor for help and he signed me off work, I was off for 2 months and then met with OH who put in a phased return plan for me, gradually increasing hours. I explained about the problems I was having with my manager, and in my report they recommended that I report to someone else. I also emailed my manager’s manager and HR to explain the issues I was having and asked to report to someone else. I have a good working relationship with everyone else in the department and there are other suitable people I could report to.
My manager’s manager said they would think about it, then the following week emailed to say they didn’t think they could accommodate it but that perhaps they could look at alternatives to improve things.
I found out I was pregnant that evening, and I emailed the following day to tell HR, OH, and my manager’s manager. MM replied to email saying congratulations and could she tell her manager, even if I wanted it to be private for now, so she had acknowledged reading the email.
The following day, we have our meeting, and she reads everything off of a script. Confirms they won’t change my reporting lines and I’ll just have to work at repairing the relationship with my manager. Then says all the stuff about the without prejudice, off the record offer. I told her I’m good at my job, I enjoy my job and I don’t want to leave.
I’ve got another meeting with OH next week and I’m wondering whether I should tell them about it confidentially or whether I have to pretend it never happened? I also really don’t feel like I’m ready to come back to work, but I’m so scared that they will try to terminate me for a lack of capability if I’m off any longer. It’s in their sick leave policy that they can do that.
What should I do? Any advice or support welcome!