BC to Utah -LDR ready to close the gap but don’t know how.. help?
Hey everyone,
I’m looking for some brutal honesty, hope, or creative advice from anyone who has successfully closed the gap between Canada and the US under complicated circumstances.
My boyfriend (M-28) lives in Utah and I (F-31) live in British Columbia. We are a 15-hour drive apart. We’ve been together for 7 months, and we are completely ready to move in together. But looking at the logistics, it feels impossible and frustrating.
Here is our current situation:
Me (BC): I don’t have my passport yet (working on it). I am a full-time student, so I cannot leave Canada right now. I also have 4 children and 3 pets, which makes uprooting my life to the US difficult even after I finish school.
Him (Utah): He works a full-time schedule of one week on, one week off. He makes great money there, but he also has heavy American student loans he needs to pay off first.
Our Roadblocks:
The Marriage Route: If we do spousal sponsorship for him to come to Canada, he is terrified of losing his ability to work and refuses to make me legally obligated to pay his way. For him to feel comfortable going this route he wants to pay his debt off first and save a significant amount of money so that I’m never put behind.
The Work Visa Route: He is totally willing to get a Canadian work visa, but every job opening he looks at in Canada pays a fraction of what he makes in the US.
We’ve discussed him moving closer to the border (Spokane area) so that atleast we cut down travel costs and time spent traveling but this only feels like a bandaid to the actual issue of being apart.
We feel completely stuck. He has a great work schedule for visiting (week on/off), but we only see eachother once every month or two.. and the border, the distance, and the financial/family realities are weighing heavily on us.
Has anyone bridged the gap from America to Canada under similar constraints? How did you handle the massive pay cut/currency difference while dealing with US debt? Is there a legal way for him to keep his US job while living in Canada, or did someone have to bite the bullet and wait years?
Any advice or success stories would mean the world right now. Thank you.