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Context: Young male, (20s) never had prior issues with chrons or anything rectum/perineal adjacent.

In general I am not constipated however a week and a half ago, I did have some constipation which I think caused a fissure somewhere behind my rectum, which ultimately may have lead to the abscess? (Or it may just be pure random chance)

Day 1 of symptoms, general soreness around rectum, nothing too bad.

Day 2: Noticed a small lump and in general more sore, brushed it off, maybe a hemorrhoid?

Day 3: Definitely more sore clear lump, assumed it was a thrombosed hemorroid, felt the lump in the perineal area right behind the anus. Went to a walk-in clinic, doctor misdiagnosed and said it was a non-thrombosed hemorrhoid and gave me some cream.

Day 4: Woke up in agonizing pain, went to ER, immediatley they said it was a perinneal abscess, and the doc there was quite angry and pissed off that the walkin doc said this was a hemorrhoid. Booked me in for the drainage, I am very lucky they recommended full anesthesia as I heard some places let you stay conscious.

Surgery was quick - doctor said there was a decent amount of pus, and the abscess was grape sized, no seton or any mention of fistula, he just mentioned to replace dressing/gauze everytime I used the washroom and to properly clean through aiming my shower head directly upwards.

Current state: Day 1 after, noticed a decent amount of blood/clear liquid mix, (not bright red per say but more of a deep pink)

Day 2 now, pain is pretty minimal, I can sit down for short periods of time relatively comfortable, and the drainage is reducing, my family doctor who i saw today recommended instead of a adhesive gauze, to line my boxers kind of like a pad, to promote airflow, I am quite hairy down there which does not help lol. Pain is a 1/10 vs what I experienced the morning I went to the ER (10/10, could barely walk properly)

Question 1: Is the fact I went to the ER relativley soon after the suspected start of the abcess reduce the chance of a fistula?

I am extremely scared this turns into a reoccurring thing and want to reduce my chances as much as possible. I got prescribed 1 week of antibiotics (amoxcyllin 875 mg, 2x a day), and am going to be very diligent with recovery.

Question 2: I am getting a CRS referral from my family doctor to track recovery, is the main concern the rate the abscess heals bottom up vs when the incision closes? The ER surgeon mentioned they only had to make a small incision, and drainage first few days is totally normal and expected to see.

Question 3: Is the general painless-ness right now a good sign or not indicative of proper healing? Its hard for me to visually see the exact incision and area as I am quite hairy and don't want to risk shaving or doing any laser removal right now. For peace of mind once I am healed I will do so to reduce chances of it coming back in the future.

Last question: Sealed gauze vs the pad-liner setup I am doing right now, if the goal is to balance the ratio of the abscess healing and the incision, is my setup right now fine? I can get quite sweaty in my perineal region, so for now loose boxers lined with gauze, and after every bowel movement I use a handheld bidet (no pressure), then after take my shower head and thoroughly clean the area (also low pressure), I have been taking 1x sitz bath a day in my bathtub, but plan to buy the actual thing to make this easer and to increase to 2-3x frequency, as I heard this prevents the incision from also prematurely closing up.

Sorry for the long post, I am very inexperienced and this all happened so quick, my ER surgeon seemed like a super smart guy, and made me worry less, he did not mention anything about fistula or setons etc, so I assume maybe my case was not super bad? He just said next time if I feel any lump to come straight to ER and not wait until the pain is bad.

Wanted to confirm I am doing things right, and get a bit of peace of mind, overall its overwhelming and embarrassing to say the least, but my fam doctor and my ER experience was very pleasing (perks of being a Canadian) e2e time in the hospital was ~3-4 hours, most of that being me recovering post surgery.

Also wishing those all the best who have been dealing with this for longer or worse experiences/versions, you all seem extremely tenacious and I pray we can all put this past us in the future.

L4 - 9 months tenure SDE

Had an unexpected medical emergency which ended up requiring a surgery when I came back home to visit my family for the long weekend here in Ontario.

Doctor expects at least 2 weeks no work, with full recovery being 3-6 weeks.

Main issue is I cannot sit for any extended time and I need family to help me with recovery care (replacing dressing, gauze etc as it is an invasive incision)

My manager is chill and understands and will talk to his L7 to try and get approval, with my current work right now there is virtually 0 difference in productivity me being remote vs in-person, as half my work right now is operational, dealing with teams across different timezones.

Anyone recently deal with similar situations with RTO5 requirements? Worst-case I submit a LOA for whatever time I need, but I rather not as I will not be getting paid, while I will be technically fine to work. I live alone in Vancouver with no direct family/close-friends that can help me with recovery.

Afraid to submit STD as insurance will likely claim I am fine to return to office as my mental capacity is still there, and "best case" recovery is shorter than what my doctor/ER surgeon recommends.

Even if my managers manager L7 approves remote working, I am afraid it will bit me in the ass later on and I get fired with no severance for extended remote work.

Any advice is appreciated, meanwhile I am looking at internal transfers to a Toronto team anyways as my hours have been completely fucked, our team is in the middle of a political storm (post outage in march) which does not expect to be ending anytime soon.

Canada. L4 SDE ~1.5 year tenure.

Want advice on Canada Life - STD - Substance Abuse Disorder

Pretty much 12-16 hour days for months, and formed a habit of dangerous substances to keep up the work. Health is severely degrading (visual proof), and if I keep abusing these substances just to be able to be barely functional, there is a genuine risk of health failure.

My fam doc who known me for a while knows my normal baseline state. My main framing to her will be that I am unable to work unless I take abuse dangerous substances (stims+benzos) plus due to little free time, that time gets spent to binging even more. I have records for an emergency services 911 call for when I thought I was gonna have a heart attack from mixing too many drugs (false alarm, but still, I guess its a good record) - I am planning to try and fast-track a psychiatrist to see after my doctor since usually insurance will ask for a specialist.

I am very stressed as I do not have much savings, the general decline in mental health and spiral has left me with minimal savings. So I want STD so I can move back home and do a complete detox and receive appropriate medical care so I do not face WDs from benzos.

Apparently substance abuse disorder is a strong case of STD in Canada as it is recognized as a disability. From my eyes the insurance provider takes the risk "If we let him keep working where they can only do so with substance abuse, with degrading health, and he has had a emergency incident, what happens if something goes wrong again?"

I have faced stress induced hairloss, bruxism and grinding teeth, and my doc back home knows I have 0 risk of abuse prior, as I was prescribed ADHD medication which I very responsibly used throughout highscool and uni and other internships, where I often took healthy breaks (2-3 months) , never increased dose (reduced infact), and had no issues with substance abuse.

I am going to tell my doctor soon, about the SUD and the ongoing physical degradation, to frame as it is dangerous for me to keep working as it is forcing me to risk my health. With just my "prescribed" or healthy dose I would not be able to work at all, due to crippling anxiety from benzo WDs and the fact I 2-3x my historical stimulant dose, something I have never done in years until the last 4-5 months at Amazon.

Canada Life insurance if that matters. Also the idea is I would be moving back home during STD to live back with my parents and quit all substances , where getting back to baseline will take me I think 3-4 months potentially. I really would like some advice on the best way to approach this so I do not get denied, as LOA will force me to pay 3 extra months of rent, which I cannot afford. If I get denied, regardless I will move home, get clean and healthy.

Fuck this company. I was normal before this lol, interned at 5-6 FAANG/Startups, had a good uni experience friends etc back home. Im just gonna rebuild my dopamine receptors and anxiety, and find somewhere that will pay me 2x in the states. Slave labour and they barely pay you peanuts as a L4 in Canada vs the work I am doing. This place sucks, and honestly most people working here are plain stupid. Minus some L5/L6/PEs who have been working for a long long time, and don't jump into the immediate politics/optics. Newer hires are literally braindead, especially these new L6/SDMs holy shit.

I have hand-held numerous L5/L6s on a weekly basis for months because they can't follow instructions, or just figure it out. ffs. we have 50 ai tools. Just fucking do it man, and stop asking me why the deprecated API I told u was deprecated 3x in 2 weeks is not working, and the instructions are wrong. (Maybe if u did not fucking download our stale doc, and read the updated one I linked 3 weeks ago dumbass)

Sorry for ugly & messy rant, made up my mind that I want to leave this shit hole, and I feel like many can relate. There are still many smart people here, its just clear that they will get taken advantage of and squeezed dry, eventually leave, or turn to pure optics and become their director/VPs little pet.

Do not work here. It is not worth it, especially as a SDE in this slop era at amazon. Maybe AWS is different since on avg they have better standards, SDO is starting to crumble down, legacy critical teams work services etc, all losing their 10+ year context members. Good luck getting Kiro to learn their brain buddy.