u/One_Student765

been rlly emo recently and i realised that every person i've genuinely wanted to become close to already has someone they're closer to. like they already have a best friend, anothet person they always text first, update about their lives, tell everything to.

it's not like i don't have friends. i do. i have people that isit and eat with, talk to in school, hang out with aft school sometimes. but... i don't think i've ever been anyone's BEST friend

whenever i think i'm getting closer to someone, i end up realising they'll always choose someone else first. if they have good news, they tell someone else first. if something bad happens, they go to someone else. and honestly i don't even blame them because they're not doing anything wrong. you can't force yourself to see someone as your "number one" friend. it just sucks being on the receiving end of it over and over again.

sometimes i look at people around me and they all seem to have their person. the one they spam on whatsapp, send random reels to, call when they're bored, or just somehow end up talking to every day without even trying.

i've never really had that, and i always feel like i'm the friend people genuinely like, but if i disappeared for a while, life would just carry on as normal for them. i think that's the loneliest part. not that people dislike me, but that i never seem to mean that much to anyone.

i thinj partjally, the blame lies on my own self. every time i feel i am getting close to someone, i always start catching myself pulling away from people before i got too attached because i am too scared of being annoying. every time i want to text first for the second time, i'll think that maybe they didnt text first cus they dony want to talk to me, or every time i have 心事 i hesitate to tell pl bcoe it feels ljke i am trauma dumping and trounling others, making a mountain out of a molehill and overthinking. thats why i say it here lol

so ya, i know friendships aren't supposed to be forced, and that people can have multiple close friends, but i can't help wondering what it's like to be someone's first choice for once

im a j1 student taking PCME and im rlly interested in studying medicine, and in the event i do not make it into local med, my parents ate willing to pay for overseas med schools. i understand that singapore has a list of recognised medical schools, and that each uni has diff requirements (e.g some requiring bio...) but am not too sure about what else i should be aware of? im still in j1 so i hope to understand more about applications and considerations so i wont be so stressed in j2

Currently Im in a friendgroup with 1 other guy and 1 girl (Im a guy) and we are currently going through some arguments? That I feel stem from deeper than the issue we argued about. Basically, Ive been feeling left out for a while now as the two of them text a lot individually and send reels to eo etc, while only the guy sends reels to me and I rarely text either of them about anything serious. And when they post stories, they comment on eo stories while neither of them even like mine... I also noticed that in our few conversations in the gc, the girl only uses emojis in conversations when the guy is in the convo 🙄

Ive actually told the guy before that I feel left out and he said that he will try to make me feel more included but tbh all he really changed was start to send me like one reel a day, he and the girl still chat a lot privately in dms and not in the gc

And yall might be thinking, just drop these friends then. But I feel it is too early and I still want to give them a chance, as honrstly I think they are both nice enough people that I would wanna be friends with. (also... cant be going through jc with 0 friends 🥲)

So... yea I feel really horrible that I lowk only have them as friends but they like eo a lot more than they like me. I really dont know what else to do but its really been weighing on my mind and Ive cried a few times because of this, I need somewhere to rant so Im coming to reddit...

Coming into JC from a boy's school, I didnt really know what to expect from a mixed school. I thought I would just stick with the boys, but after two terms of school I've now formed a friend group with another guy and a girl. In the beginning, I saw my relationship with the girl as purely platonic, and did not have any romatic interest at all till recently.

For some context, I initially made friends with the girl before making friends with the guy, but later on both of us befriended the guy so we became a friendgroup.

I think what made me realise I caught feelings was when the other guy started having relationship issues with his gf, and started consulting her (and not me) for a lot of issues. At first, I was ok with this as I respect his privacy. However of late I feel quite jealous every time I find out the two of them have been talking about things I wasnt informed of. I also started to find myself awaiting texts from the girl, and feel unusually happy when we had long conversations. And thing is, I only started feeling like this in the past 1-2 weeks tho weve been friends since March.

And funny enough, even though she is a good friend, I actually think shes quite a red flag girlfriend-wise based on some things shes said before. Which is why Im really confused as to why I started to catch feelings. Everything about my logical mind is telling me she is a red flag, and that I would never date her anyways.

But yea tbh its quite weird, Im sure ill get over this soon, but just a little confession cus I found this quite interesting haha