Why are we like this?
F/44 born and raised in the UK. No children. Never married.
Today, for the first time, I feel ashamed of being Nigerian. Of being Igbo.
I wasn't technically raised "in the culture". My parents have done their best over the years and I understand the language (don't ask me to speak it though).
After I graduated and started working, my uncles encouraged my siblings and I to travel home for an extended time, so I did. Whilst I'm glad I did, I was shocked at the treatment I received from strangers.
As a single woman, I had no say or bargaining power. In my naivety, I thought I could establish a business there and relocate permanently. Nope.
Even simply shopping in the market...they ignored me (the paying customer) and addressed whoever I was with, talk less of trying to negotiate business premises/deals.
I gave up on the idea when I returned home but have tried my best to remain connected to "home".
Fast forward to today, I saw a post on Facebook (several in fact) where women talked about finding and keeping true love. I understand that dating/courting is difficult across the globe, but the comments, FROM IGBO MEN, floored me.
They spoke as if we're commodities, with little in the way of human rights. And the age factor...apparently women over 40 are used and damaged goods...we should go and find single dad's to marry.
It has always been my dream to marry an Igbo man but the more I'm exposed to their generalised characters and traditions, I'm disappointed.
I guess, with this post, I'd like to establish whether my experiences and observations are the exception or the norm?
Why don't we represent ourselves well in public spaces?
Why do we lack compassion and respect for others?