Anyone ChubbyFIRE'd with young kids, what finally made you believe you had enough?
Early/Mid 40s couple, 2 young kids, VHCOL area.
Current snapshot: NW: ~$6.5M, Investable assets: $5.7M
Spending: ~$180-220K/yr
HHI: ~$750K-$850K; Both have demanding careers
A little background: I grew up with significant financial insecurity as part of an immigrant family, so I know some of my thinking is influenced by that.
What's interesting is that every milestone seems to move the goalposts:
- At ~$3.7M NW, after a layoff, I worried I'd never get back on track
- At ~$5M NW, I worried we couldn't afford all the future expenses ahead of us.
- At ~$6.5M, I find myself worrying about AI bubble, market crashes, college costs, healthcare, aging parents, and whether we're underestimating future spending.
The strange part is that we haven't lived like monks to get here. We've traveled a lot, eaten out a lot, spent on experiences, invested in our kids, donated time and money heavily, and generally spent freely on things that matter to us. I don't feel like I've delayed living.
At the same time:
- We're still raising young kids (10 and 6)
- We don't yet have what we'd consider our forever home - Kids are growing up
- It often feels like our most expensive years are ahead of us rather than behind us.
So my question for those who actually made the transition to ChubbyFIRE:
Was there a point where you stopped focusing on all the things that could go wrong and genuinely trusted that you had enough?
In hindsight, were young children and anticipated future expenses distorting your perception of financial independence?
Age : How did you deal with early age, i.e. the 4% rule is reliant on shorter retirement timeframe, at our current age, we have much longer.
Or is the reality that "one more year" never completely goes away, regardless of net worth?
Interested in hearing from people who have actually crossed the bridge, especially those who grew up with money scarcity themselves.