u/SeekerOfXYZ

I'll elaborate on my questioning journey so far to narrow down what exactly I'm trying to ask:

I've identified as angelgender for some time now, as I've felt I'm 'he/him' but in the same way biblical accounts of angels default to 'he' for what are genderless beings. I have zero connection to human notions of gender and personally find it quite trivial. But now, I realize my disconnection from humanity goes far deeper than that and am considering if I may be alterhuman. I do feel like an angel quite often, and it's especially euphoric when I unmask and stop trying to blend in with humans. Particularly, I feel as if I'm a fallen angel, because I'm very much not the image of a pious follower of Christianity, and feel most in tune with myself when defying authority and forging my own path.

But the thing is that, as an atheist, I do not personally believe in Abrahamic angels, therefore I think it'd be nonsensical for me to consider myself literally an angel, so afaik otherkin is not a suitable term for me. However, I also believe my feeling of being an angel is involuntary, so otherlink doesn't quite work either. Is there a good term for "I feel like X despite the fact I don't think X exists?," or am I misunderstanding what it takes to be an otherkin?

(This is not to invalidate angelkin btw. I am new to all this stuff and am trying to make space for others' identities I don't personally understand. This is just about my personal identity.)

I'm currently working in retail and am wanting to switch to trucking (my ideal work would be garbage truck driving, but I'm open to all opportunities.) I'm coincidentally scheduled to have chest surgery in mid-December, which will require 2 weeks of complete rest and 6 further weeks of no heavy lifting. I should be back to full health after recovery, I just don't know if employers will tolerate new hires immediately needing medical leave and temporary accommodation.

So far, my plan looks something like this:

• August: Study for the written test and get my CLP. Meanwhile, I will look into ways to get BTW schooling covered by WIOA or receive a loan.
• September-November: Attend driving school alongside my retail job, working with my boss to make the scheduling work, of course.
• December-February: Have my surgery and wait out my recovery time at my retail job. Meanwhile, I can start hunting for trucking jobs and let them know when I'll be ready to start.
• February: Hopefully start my first trucking job.

Are there holes in this plan I haven't considered that may cause problems? Are there more efficient paths for getting into trucking, like perhaps there are industry sectors that don't involve much lifting or would be willing to accommodate my needs? (I'm aware I'd probably get more specific answers by asking certain folks directly, but I figure Reddit truckers may be able to inform my plan with what they know.) Thank you for reading and for any input you may give.