‘I promise I’ll come back’
My boyfriend (26M) and I (29F) broke up after nearly a year of being together. He’s told me the reasoning for it is that he needs the time and space to go to therapy, get better (working on his communication style - he tends to shut down and struggles to connect with himself to understand how he is feeling and his emotions).
What’s different and tripped me up is that he has promised and is absolutely certain that he wants us to be in each other’s lives at some point. I’ve been in a break up before but this one has brought up some really ugly and scary emotions in me that have taken me by surprise. I am neurodivergent and really struggling to hold the duality of some emotions and feelings I’m having - I feel so hurt that he chose to leave and know I need to move forward and begin to rebuild my life without him. But at the same time I’m not sure how to hold hope and trust that he’s going to work on his stuff. He has promised me that he is going to only act in our best interest during this time apart, and call me a skeptic but I am scared to believe him and get disappointed again.
My headspace is getting darker, I feel myself falling into anxious rabbit holes, I have no energy for things, I’m not hungry, everything feels like effort and I can’t sleep properly. My emotions are an absolute trainwreck and I feel myself swinging from anger to sadness.
He’s never given me a reason to doubt him, but I don’t know how to move on and hold onto hope at the same time.
Please be as kind as you can 🥺I’m a first time poster and not feeling the best but hoping I might be able to find a community who might understand :(