I am a needle - why is there so much tension
Here I am, waiting my turn to make buttery smooth passes through the tissue with my surgical grade stainless steel circle taper point needle gently positioned at a perfect 45 degree angle in gold handled tungsten carbide tipped needle drivers. The scrub tech has positioned me at the edge of the mayo stand ready to be used at any moment. Suddenly a hand comes from across the table and snatches me off the mayo violently. It’s the intern. My beloved scrub tech glares. I am immediately repositioned by the intern to a 90 degree angle and he chokes up almost crushing my needle point. More glares from my guardian mayo angel. Just as I’m about to dive into the wound with the grace of a Swan I am slammed into the knuckle of the attending surgeon. I feel my point bend on the bone as it jars me. A small tear trickles out of the corner of the attending’s eye as she smiles and brushes it off, “the scrub tech must have distracted you”. She is trying a new anger management strategy that avoids harming the residents. It seems to work and I notice the intern blush. However, no one slanders my mayo queen and she quickly plots to key the attendings car on her next break. On the interns attempts a first pass I make sure to drag through the tissue with my newly bent point and then instantly break my suture at the phalange as the intern uses too much tension. My instrument whisperer then whips around to the intern “you dumbass that needle was contaminated” as she gracefully passes me off the field into the red Valhalla where all sharps past and present go to their great reward.