u/Snoo63020

In 2019 I signed the lease on a one bedroom for $950. It was a dump. Worst looking porch and house one the block. On a block of little front yard city gardens we had an enormous wooden handmade trash can dumpster/barn container for the trash cans. The kitchen and bath had not been updated since the 50’s, 60’s. Cheap panorama on the walls throughout painted battleship grey. Cheap windows, the kind that trap moisture and dirt in between them so that they cannot be cleaned. Landlord special repairs and upgrades throughout. For the first year I cried. I hated it. But it didn’t last. I grew to love it. I’ve made it my own. My home. I convinced the landlord to dismantle the trash barn. He did. I planted a garden that is thriving, ferns, nasturtium, geraniums, lavender, oxalis, hostas, and more. I asked him if he would like to contribute $ to the garden. He declined. So did my building neighbors. I kept going. The front door to my apartment had been recently replaced. Unfinished. I asked him to paint it. He declined. I asked him to deduct the money I spent on paint for it. He declined. I bought an outdoor rug for the front porch, window boxes, found a cool modernist sculpture and dragged that home, put it in the garden. My neighbor in the house next door bought a wooden slatted partition to hide our trash cans and had it installed because she was tired of looking at our ugly trash cans.
I begged my landlord for one new trash can. We had only three for the five unit building and one of them had a one foot hole in the bottom. No lid. He declined. I mentioned it to my neighbor in the other house next door- complaining and apologizing about how bad our trash cans looked. My neighbor bought us 2 new trash cans!
I’m friends with all of my building neighbors we do things together. They helped me to garden and now they do contribute money to it. We look out for each other. We help each other , hiding packages for each other if we’re not around. We have each other’s keys, socialize and that’s all me. I invite them to decorate the outside of the house for Christmas and Halloween. I made that happen and I think it’s worth something.
I cleared the back yard myself and planted a cover crop to get rid of weeds and just got around to planting another garden there. I love this dump.

From 2024-2026 I underwent extensive dental reconstruction. It took a long time at a dental school- their student program. I had extractions done that left my smile looking like a jack-o-lantern. ( the timing was supposed to work out well because I did it when I was out of work but still has unemployment coming in. ) They said it’d be that way for a month. But it took until December 2025, 4 months (!!) before I got the upper bridge that gave me, I must say, a pretty nice looking smile! I didn’t, couldn’t start interviewing for jobs until January 2026.

In 2025 , when I lost my job, the shop I worked for closed (I loved that little shop!) and I collected unemployment and because I’m an artist, I began selling paintings and creating many different crafts and upcycled apparel and made greeting cards, sold them to shops, vended at local flea markets, generally hustled. I looked for jobs. I became late with the rent and began habitually paying it by the second Friday of each month.
The unemployment compensation ran out. I got worried, scared. I applied for many jobs- the kinds of jobs I used to always get, always get at least an interview for. Nothing. Lots of rejection. Began painting silly fake folk art paintings and selling them for $100 or whatever I could get. Appealing to the masses. I borrowed money from family. I tried to get those ai training jobs, tried to get work from home jobs because I couldn’t go to work with missing teeth.
I was getting pretty worried that I wasn’t able to take care of myself for the first time ever. I’ve always worked. I’m not married. No partner. No second income. Just me. But I’m not complaining about this. I love my independent lifestyle. Always have.
The landlord raised the rent $50 (10%) a month every single year. My income didn’t not increase. I complained once or twice appealed to his heart, but it didn’t work lol.
I made the decision to begin collecting my Social Security retirement benefits. I applied for them because I was turning 62 May. they would begin in July. All along this entire terribly taxing stressful scary year I have kept in touch with my Landlord telling him what was happening with me, telling him when I would be paying the rent late again(I have paid hundreds of dollars in late fees, like $700 in late fees)

One month ago I finally got a part-time job! I’m working and picking up extra shifts wherever I can. As soon as I knew, reached out to my landlord and I told him that I’m finally employed again and my retirement benefits start in July. (I had already told him this a few months ago ) And now this difficult year of paying the rent late is over. It’s not gonna happen anymore. Stability has returned blah blah blah. Thank you for bearing with me, apologies, etc.

For the first time in in a long time I started to see that there was light at the end of the tunnel. Now I wouldn’t have to hustle so hard and stress so much I feel like a burden to my family.
Relief, sweet, sweet relief.

Yesterday I got an email from my landlord stating that he’s not renewing my lease. He didn’t even give me a reason. I’ve lived here for six years. I’ve had Neighbors come and thank me for cleaning up the front yard for getting better looking trash bins. For organizing Block cleanup Neighbor for buying compost and spending time and energy rehabilitating the tree pits up and down the block because they’d all just been neglected for years and years. I’m not even angry yet. I just feel sad. Like a deflated balloon. I wish I could buy a little house so I don’t ever have to worry about this again. This is probably the longest thing I have ever written in my life. if you’re still reading, what should I do? My credit score is not great. you know by now I’m not sitting on bank rolls. I don’t live in New York City anymore so there are no tenant protection for my situation. If you were me, what would you do?