Lost and out of uni
I’m (21F) about to finish uni. Recently diagnosed with ME after years of health getting worse (this year a drastic decline in being able to leave the house/being able to do basic tasks).
I felt symptoms from age 15/16 and doctors just kept putting me on folic acid any time I’d have the energy to go to the doctors about it (they already had me on the mini pill- so no periods).
Anyway, the last two years of uni have been awful. Problems with my attendance, loss of passion in what I do. I think I’ll pass but I feel like I’ve not actually done anything I’m proud of and that hurts most. I can’t go back and live with my family (bad relationship- currently minimal but considering no contact). (They also don’t understand my mental/physical health issues and quite frankly don’t really care)
My partner is doing his final year at uni next year. We want to keep living together in the city we are at uni, but once I’m out of uni in a few weeks I don’t know how I’ll survive financially- I can barely do basic tasks to look after myself. The job hunt has been endless and nothing- and no work from home jobs either. I don’t think I’ll be able to cope not living with my partner (for context I also have BPD *ffs* - I manage it very healthily but still really struggle with attachment/separation anxiety)
I’ve been referred to an ME specialist but it’s all a waiting game. PIP is the next thing but I’ve had an awful experience with them before so not feeling too confident. I’m just kind of lost and mourning the life I thought I’d have. Things are getting more difficult by the day and it feels so isolating and like no one understands (other than my partner who tries his best).
I don’t know anyone who has ME, so no one to talk to/get advice from or just relate with. When it first started getting this bad and I got diagnosed I thought: “Wait? How do people with this survive? How will I? How do other people manage this? How do they work and get money to live?”
Any comments would be much appreciated