Family Worsening Condition
I can't do this anymore.
I was diagnosed five years ago with mild ME, and my family was supportive at first, but when I didn't get better, things started to change. My older sister, who had been like my best friend, started to pull away and really stopped including me in her life. My mom and dad are trying, but it's killing them to see me not improving.
Worst of all, my younger brother, who I didn't have a great relationship before, turned mildly ableist. I can't say it's bad, but everytime I see him, I end up in a flare. He lives across the country so I only see him maybe twice a year, but it hurts me so much each time.
Recently, our family started going to therapy. It hasn't helped much, and honestly revealed to me that my brother wasn't willing to change and thought I was the problem, which I haven't been able to forget. He thinks I can get better, I just don't try and said nasty things when I mentioned how worse things can get. He thinks I'm jealous of him, which is crazy because even with the life I have (and I'm not happy in the slightest), I honestly might choose mine now over his. It's just unappealing to me.
The problem is my family sees every little jab at my illness as our previous conflict and don't want to get involved. Even when he's mocking me for going to a park to do yoga instead of running (which was a big step up for me, I overexerted myself a while ago and am still paying the price), my family insists it's a personality conflict.
I've tried explaining. I'm just so exhausted of having to defend myself and everyone acting like I'm the bad guy for not wanting to be torn down in little ways all day every day. I used to work part time, something that hurt me immensely, to pay for an apartment with some roommates, and I feel like I was happier there. I was in horrible pain and could do nothing but sleep on my days off, but having that community of roommates and friends who understand and care is just something I can't believe I gave up. Moving in with my parents was supposed to be so I could get better, not to feel like I don't matter. Physical pain is so much easier for me to push through than emotional pain.
I don't know the point. Just venting ig.
Tldr: my brother has been worsening my condition and my family does nothing about it because they see it as old conflicts. I don't know what to do.
(Let me know if I formatted anything wrong I tried to look over the rules to make sure but ill change anything if I missed something)