MARAC
Hello all. I’m posting with a personal query, I hope that’s okay? I did check the rules beforehand.
Throwaway account for obvious reasons. Sorry if this is mega long!
Long story short: in a complicated situation with a guy I’m seeing. Things have escalated, become murkier, and led me to think I should consider ending it. This is difficult for 101 reasons, but also due to the fact that he doesn’t strike me as the type who would roll over and accept that. He’s also proved in conversation about previous partners etc that he does not take being cut off lightly.
I’m not a social worker but I’ve got a decent working knowledge of safeguarding due to my job, and also aware of risks/red flags within relationships and also the increased risk when leaving.
As such, I reached out to my LA’s IDVA service for some advice/support around safety/exit planning. Lovely IDVA, completed a DASH/risk assessment, and was told she wanted to take it to MARAC. I did have a fleeting contact earlier this year with the service (but pulled out almost immediately) where they had also wanted to refer to MARAC but were unable to as I did not provide the guy’s name.
In order to take it to MARAC they’d need his details (obvs), which I’m still VERY reluctant to provide. They said they could offer me a closed MARAC with no proactive policing etc (him getting arrested would be absolutely catastrophic) to try and reassure me.
I do not feel as though a MARAC is warranted or justified. I really just feel as though I need some advice re: leaving safely and managing any potential backlash there. A MARAC referral feels like overkill. I’m also incredibly reluctant to share his details. Fortunately I do not need support from multiple agencies such as housing or ASC (no care and support needs). I’ve also had next to no contact with external agencies about it, so there’s no real information to share.
I guess my question is: realistically, what is the benefit of a MARAC as opposed to just safety planning with the IDVA team themselves? I don’t need much (if anything) by way of multi agency planning, I feel as though the situation sounds worse to the IDVA than it is, and I really don’t want to give his details if we can avoid it. I’m also just really embarrassed and ashamed at a lot of the stuff and feel as though as I got myself in this position I should get myself out without causing a massive scene 🥲
Apologies for the long ramble, and apologies if not the correct sub for this.
PS: no children involved, no need for CSC