Stuck in perpetual limbo
I’m caretaking for my 71 yr old brother who went thru a severe illness. His kidneys no longer work and he lost a foot. He is also incontinent. he’s not diabetic. We’re both managing as best we can and he is improving. he’s gone from not being able to sit up to transferring to a wheelchair & sometimes walking with a walker. I learned how to operate the hoyer and after a year of home cooking & healing we turned that rented hoyer crane back in.
It’s just that there are still sooo many issues. He needs to go to the podiatrist, the dentist, he just got a pacemaker, he needs a badly healed surgical scar fixed, he needs to go to a Gi doctor.
I want to go back to my family! I have kids and a house and grandkids in another state. it’s all so complicated. he won’t come to my home, and there isn’t room for him anyhow. I know you’ll all say just leave, I’ve done my job, but he doesn’t have anyone. how can I walk away from my brother who can’t walk? he’s a nice man. there is no one else to take care of him. he gets PT at home 2x a week.
When I came to help him I didn’t realize this was a two year thing. he won’t talk about it, I know he’s petrified I’ll just leave. I have someone come four morning a week.
Assisted living and nursing care are way too expensive, and the amount of care he needs makes home health care too expensive too. I just don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I’m in limbo. He doesn’t really even seem to think bout my situation and when we talk about it we end up arguing about it over the small stuff.
do you think people can be prayed out of limbo? that’s what they said when we were kids. no one is coming to save me and I really don’t know how to get back home.