u/america1008

In 1998/1999, we had decided that we wanted to find some Hanumanji murti’s & photos. We particularly wanted a picture of Bal Hanuman (Baby Hanuman) & one of Hanuman hugging Ram. We had told your grandmother’s brother, in India, to look out for these. He had a habit of going to the main Hanuman temple in Delhi, every Tuesday. He had done so, for years. Outside this temple are many shops. They sell sweets, flowers, calendars, pictures & other puja supplies. He had visited these shops many times to look for what we wanted but, for weeks, had been unsuccessful.

One day, he found a little boy selling calendars. He had never seen the boy before or noticed his shop. He told the boy what he wanted, & the boy looked overjoyed. He asked him to mind the store for a while (unheard of in India) & came back a little later with a picture of baby Hanuman. He has never seen the boy since!

 

• Simon Andriesz- The British banker & whistleblower who linked Howard Lutnick to Epstein, was found dead today. Cause of death: Suicide
• Jeffrey Epstein – The financier and convicted sex offender died by suicide in his federal prison cell on August 10, 2019, while awaiting trial on federal sex trafficking charges. Cause of death: Suicide
• Jean-Luc Brunel – The French modeling agent and close associate of Epstein, who faced allegations of procuring minors for Epstein, was found dead in a Paris prison cell on February 19, 2022, while awaiting trial for rape and trafficking. Suicide
• Steven Hoffenberg – The disgraced financier and former business partner who hired Epstein in the 1980s was found dead in his apartment on August 24, 2022. Was found dead in his home, after a friend asked for a welfare check.
• Virginia Giuffre – The most prominent survivor and accuser of Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell died by suicide on April 25, 2025, at the age of 41.
• At least 8 countries have opened investigations related to Epstein. Of those at least Poland; Norway & Latvian officials stated that the US DOJ, as of Feb 2026, had been unresponsive to requests of mutual legal assistance, on the Epstein investigations. (Forbes).
• Ghislaine Maxwell- was moved to a veritable holiday resort, by Todd Blanche.
•  Despite the Epstein transparency Act, the Epstein pedophiles continue to be protected, in the US.

 

 

“Iran is ready to fold up, but America is sending more troops to the Middle East” (D. J. Trump 10/2/26). Apparently, Iranian nuclear facilities have now become ‘drug factories’.

VARYING OBJECTIVES & MULTIPLE VICTORY LAPS ALREADY

We have “totally & completely obliterated " Iran's nuclear capability (DJT June21, 2025).

He again declared "total & complete" victory on 3/11/26; 3/24/26; April 7, 2026.

April 17th 2026, he declared the Strait of Hormuz "completely open & ready for business".

May 23rd, 2026, he declared the Iran deal "largely negotiated".

June 14, 2026 “the deal with the Islamic Republic of Iran is now complete & I am authorizing the re-opening of Hormuz.

March, April & May & September also came multiple machismo bull ##it with ultimatums about destroying the Iranian civilization; destroying their civilian infrastructure; taking over of Kharg island & taking Iranian oil...

RECAP OF WHERE WE ARE

This is a self-created war, and there was never any imminent threat.

Neither the IAEA nor our own Intelligence believed that there was ever any imminent threat. In fact, Trump’s own (self-professed, MAGA) Director of counter terrorism, Joe Kent resigned because of his disagreement with Trump.

Not a single US ally other than Israel, joined us in the war. That itself should be telling, in terms of how imminent the threat was.

We did not achieve regime change. It is the same regime, except younger & more hard lined.

We did not demilitarize Iran. US intelligence estimates that 60/70% of Iran’s military & air capability remains intact.

We did not remove Iran’s nuclear threat. IAEA believes that Iran still has 400 to 440 kilograms of uranium enriched up to 60%. This level of purity is just a technical step away from the 90% weapons-grade threshold. Experts note this remaining material would be enough to produce roughly 10 to 12 nuclear warheads.

We did not make the region safer. In his post on May 23^(rd), 2026, Trump named Saudi Arabia, UAE, Dubai, Qatar & Pakistan as allies who are helping broker peace. Every one of these countries is pre dominantly Sunni, whereas Iran is predominantly Shia. The Shia/Sunni divide dates back about 1400 years, to 632CE. You add Israel to the mix & this becomes immensely complicated. Moreover, many of these countries - & others in the region – saw bombs on their streets, for the first time.

We did not increase the economic consequences on the Iranian regime. If anything, they realize that Hormuz is the proverbial tail that wags the dog.  It is also likely that they will get some of their economic sanctions lifted, when Trump takes his false victory lap. The regime is now probably better off financially. than when the war started.

This war has already cost 23 US lives; plus tens of billions in tax payer funds; thousands of civilian lives; millions of family displacements; a loss of all our traditional allies & a loss of our international standing. UN’s FAO estimates that the Hormuz blockade could add another 45 million people to food insecurity & starvation, around the world. Our national average price of gas, on Feb 27, 2026 (the day before this conflict began) was $2.80 per gallon- now $4.50. Our farmers are probably already too late to plant for next season. The price for diesel is about $6.50 a gallon – it was about $3.81 on Feb 27, 2026. Trump calls this the Golden age of America -"the hottest economy in recorded history".

He is under pressure both domestically & internationally, to draw this to a conclusion asap. His machismo bull ##it about bombing them out of existence is not only in contravention of US & international law, but also likely to alienate an otherwise pro American, Iranian civilian population, as well as our allies, in the Gulf.

Trump has no cards to play other than TACO, & then claiming a false victory. Besides, he has already tried 'bombing the hell out of them' & it did not raise the white flag, as he thought they would..

We will take TACO, because the alternatives are much worse. Trump thought this would a quick in & out like Venezuela, & it was not. It is time to fold & get out.

In 1999, my family & I had gone to the bhandara in MA.

I was helping cook the puris, in a huge kadhai (somewhat like a deep iron wok). We filled the kadhai with oil, & start cooking once the oil reaches boiling point. All the cooking is done on a wood fire, outside.

I was bare feet, as is customary when cooking prasad, & my younger son – who was roughly 13 at the time – was standing next to me. The oil started boiling and some of it spilt over, on my bare foot. The foot became red but there was no pain & no blister!

I turned to my son to show him the miracle – boiling hot oil fell on my foot, & yet nothing happened!  His eyes had welled up with tears, & before I could say anything he said to me “Babaji must be in so much pain”. 😭🙏

 It was blood pressure inducing, and laughable to hear Republican Senators question Jack Smith.

Jack Smith is a veteran career prosecutor whose three-decade legal career spans local, federal, and international law. Legal peers and professional organizations have frequently highlighted his actions in pursuing complex corruption, violent crime, and human rights cases. He has received the DOJ Director’s award & the AG’s award for distinguished service. He has a record of securing convictions of Democrats, & Republicans alike.

These same supercilious Republicans, on the other hand, have a history of selling their dignity, for less than a dime:

Ted Cruz: "Donald Trump is a pathological liar. He doesn't know the difference between truth and lies. He lies practically with every word that comes out of his mouth."
He also described Trump as "utterly amoral" and said, "bullies don't come from strength; they come from weakness." “A wannabe mobster”.

Now: He is an instinctual genius and grades his economy as an “A”

JD Vance : Trump is “Americas Hitler”. “Unfit for the highest office in the land”. “Can’t stomach Trump”. He is “cultural heroin.

Now: Donald Trump is "super smart" and that from a pure IQ perspective, "he would either be near the top or at the top" compared to all other U.S. presidents in history.

Marco Rubio: “The most vulgar, con artist to ever seek the Presidency”, he said about Trump.  “He is a third world strong man”.

Now: Peace (?) in Gaza:  "No other U.S. President could've made this happen. “2025 was the most transformational year, since WWII, thanks to this President”. “Trump is the most historic figure”. Of course, the pinnacle of Rubio’s career came with the shoes, that were at least two sizes too big!

Who can forget the outrage on the Senate floor, immediately after Jan 6^(th):  Mitch McConnell (R-KY); the late Lindsay Graham; John Kennedy (R Lou); Bill Cassidy (R-LA); Ben Sasse (R-NE); Pat Toomey (R-PA); Lisa Murkowski (R-AK); Mitt Romney (R-UT); Shelley Moore Capito (R-WV); Rob Portman (R-OH); Dan Sullivan (R-AK); Chuck Grassley (R-IA), Thom Tillis (R-NC).

BUT deafening silence since then : the Jan 6^(th) pardons; the sexual assault allegations/ indictments; the Epstein files; the war in Iran; bombing of an elementary school; the Venezuelan boat strikes; the open pay for play; the no bid contracts; the tariff fiasco; the threat to take over Greenland or Canada; the reprehensible behavior with Zelensky; the self-awarded: signature on currency; face on coins; face on passports; passes to National parks; name on federal buildings; the ball room; the Trump Arc; the Lincoln reflective pool; the threats to hang Mike Pence; the insults to John McCaine; Gen John Keely; Gen Milley; our veterans; the wall that Mexico was paying for; the welcome mat to Putin; the self-comparison to Jesus; the AI generated pooping on the American people…

This lot of Republicans would probably have lauded the same Jack Smith, had Trump not been President.

The years 1990 – 1993 were particularly difficult for us financially. We had rented a home in Randolph; New Jersey & I often struggled to make the rent payments, because my businesses had just started, & were not really generating any consistent income.

One day, our landlord sent me fax (for the generation who may not know what a fax is, they were considered cool those days! lol) stating that he was being transferred back to New Jersey, & wanted us to vacate the house. We were under a tight budget, barely making ends meet as it is, but we started looking for another home. The rent prices had gone up significantly since we had last rented, & I became increasingly depressed, and frustrated.

One day, I was reading a newspaper & I saw a small advertisement stating that a tenant wanted to break his lease, in an area three or four towns away. We went to see it. The house was twice the size of the one we were living in & much nicer & newer. It was also asking less rent, than the one we were living in. We rented it immediately.

We had lived in it about two years, as tenants when we received a phone call, from the landlord. He was no longer likely to ever move back to New Jersey, & as such had decided to sell the house. He asked if I would be interested in buying it. I told him that we loved the house but, even without asking him the sale price, I told him that we could not afford to buy it.

He asked me how much I could afford. I told him that I did not know because I would need to get a loan & that may be difficult because my businesses were still not generating too much income. He kept trying to pressure me to give him an amount. I finally relented, & gave him a figure. He reacted by telling me that the amount was about $60,000 less than his asking price. I told him that I understood & that we would start looking for another house.

The next day he called me again & said that he would lend me the $60,000 shortfall, if I wanted to buy the house.

I told him that I thought that the price that he was asking was fair & while I appreciated his offer, I could not accept it because I would still have to repay him & I did not have the money to do so. I also told him that I had little or no credit history because I had not lived in the US, for too long, at the time. As such, it may be a problem for me to get any loan from the bank.  He thanked me for being honest & told me that he would then put it up for sale.

We were getting increasingly desperate because all the other houses that we saw were more expensive & worse, in terms of quality. Then there were also other considerations such as the childrens school; the cost of moving etc.

A few days had elapsed since the landlord & I had spoken, when the phone rang again. It was Bob, my landlord again. He called to say that if I bought the house, he would reduce the price by $20,000 & lend me any amount that the bank did not – imagine a landlord doing that! I again said thank you, but declined.

In the days that followed, he kept calling & saying to me that, for some reason, he had this incessant urge to sell the house to me, & no one else. Now, each time he called, he kept reducing the price, further & further. I kept reminding him that I thought his original price was fair, but he kept pushing back saying he cannot explain why he needs me & my family, to live in that house. He himself did not know why.

At any rate, this went on for a week or so & we finally agreed to a price below what it cost him to build it, but then began the real miracle!

I approached a couple of banks for the loan who turned me down because I had inadequate credit history. I, in fact, called the landlord to call off the deal, & with some reluctance he listed the property for sale, & we started looking for other rentals….again!

One day, I was in at a grocery shop, when I bumped into an old banking colleague. We had not seen each other in over a decade. It turns out that he now owned his own mortgage, Company. He got me the entire loan, within a matter of days.

We lived in that house, about 30 years. It was Graced to host hundreds of Satsang. It housed our Hanumanji; housed countless Babaji photos, & so much else, that HIS Grace allowed. There were Satsang whom we had never met before, or since, who came and stayed, all drawn by HIS love.

Your grandmother & I have often discussed the fact that we could never have afforded this house. Yet, we came across someone who wanted to break a lease at a time that we were looking to move. We found a landlord who insisted on selling to us. I found a friend who orchestrated a loan, well beyond our entitlement & immediately after we moved in, my businesses improved so that I had the income to pay my loan installments. It feels like it was always Babaji’s plan; we just did not know it.

 

In 1969, my father worked for Mrs. Indira Gandhi. He would work insane hours, 7 days a week. One night, he had returned from work very late & was having dinner, when my mom & paternal grandmother started lecturing him about how his schedule was unsustainable, & that he needed to ask for a transfer. This discussion went on, for a while & finally my father explained to them that his name had often come up for postings abroad, but that Mrs. Gandhi would not release him & that he was unwilling to advocate for himself. The conversation ended with him saying “as long as she is PM, you need to come to terms with the fact that this is going to be my job; & these are going to be my hours”.

A week or so went by, when someone came to our house & said that Babaji had sent him. Babaji was staying at someone’s house locally & had called us. We arrived at this house & I remember that there was a room full of people. Babaji was sitting on a chair & the rest were on the floor. HE was flinging fruits at them. As we walked in, he saw my father & there was a beaming smile on HIS face. He said to my father “You have come, Sushu. (my dad’s name was Sushital, but Babaji called him by his nick name, Sushu) How are you?”.

“I am very well Babaji. In fact, I am so well that I have started taking bribes!”, my dad joked.

Babaji laughed “Rubbish, you do not have the liver to take bribes” & then HE giggled some more.( As a complete aside, I loved HIS giggle. It was like hearing a baby who had just learned to laugh).

As we proceeded to do pranam, HE asked my father whether we had packed? My father, looking incredulous & amused, asked “packed, where are we going?”. Babaji responded by telling him that we were going abroad. My father said “that is not possible, Babaji. Mrs. Gandhi will never release me”. Babaji giggled & told him “you have always argued with me, since you were a child. Stop arguing & go pack”. My father asked HIM how HE knew. Babaji laughed again & told him “I have a wireless with God”.

We were in Washington D.C. by March of 1970, despite the fact that Mrs. Gandhi had declined to release my father for over two years, prior to that.

HE handed us some prasad, and asked us to go. HE had not even allowed us to sit down, that day. As we were leaving, HE said to my father “Sushu, do not drive a black car”….not context, no nothing!

The day before we were leaving for Washington, my father had borrowed a colleague’s black ambassador – having forgotten Babaji’s admonition. We were in an accident – not a serious one, but accident nonetheless. It is only then that my father remembered what Babaji had said.

 

Your grandmother & I have been through the same trials & tribulations in life, as anyone else. We have had successes & failures; we have had tremendous joy & sorrow; we have had total peace & ‘gut wrenching’ worry; we have had material comforts beyond our wildest expectations & there have been occasions when we did not know where the next rent check would come from. All of these have been necessary & important in making us who we are but I recognize now, more than ever, that there is no aspect of our lives - & there never has been – that was not being guided by Babaji. The unpleasant was a necessary aspect of life’s journey – HE gave us strength to bear it & wisdom to deal with it. The pleasant too was necessary but HE taught us that while it was alright to be euphoric; the pleasant & the unpleasant were like passing clouds & nothing more than temporary stops in our journey.

In 2014, my mother was diagnosed with cancer. Your grandmother & I had moved to India, to care for her. In 2016 we came back to the US briefly, to deal with some business-related problems, I had. I had intentionally withheld these problems from my mother, because it would serve no purpose, other than adding to her worries.

On the flight back from India, my wife & I discussed our situation, & came to the following decisions/conclusions:

1)    The nature of the problems were such that I could (maybe) resolve them, provided I returned to the US, for an indefinite period of time.

This was unacceptable to me because I was not willing to leave my mother, at the time.

2)    If I did not resolve the problem, the bank would not only foreclose on my business, but also our home.

3)    My wife & I were not willing to put my mother in a nursing home, or in someone else’s care.

4)    We did not have an alternative place to stay, or in fact the time to move, before our return to India.

At any rate, we took the decision that leaving my mother would be more of an infliction on our soul; so, come what may on the business front, my mother was more of a priority.

As we arrived home that morning, I had phone conversations with my staff; sent out emails to the licensing agencies & then proceeded to tell my son’s that I was going to handover the keys to the business, & the house to the bank. We would do the best we can about finding a room to rent & finding means of a livelihood, but leaving Ma was not an option. Whatever happens, we would say nothing to my mother.

I hung up the phone with, one of my son’s when the magnitude of the problem hit me.

I remember that tears started rolling down my face & my first thought was “Babaji, I am sorry that I am an unworthy devotee, in this life. If I had enough faith, I would never worry, because however it turns out, it is your will, but…”

As I felt the tears still rolling down, the phone rang. It was my mother & my first thought was to stop crying, lest she pick up on it. My second thought was something has gone wrong with her health, in the one day we had been back.

My mother did not thankfully pick up on the fact that I was crying, but said to me (without any context) “It is strange. Today, for some reason, I was thinking of your paternal grandfather. When your father & I were newly married, we were staying in a joint family in Jhansi & two of your aunts (father’s sisters) had died of typhoid, within a month of each other. They were 14 & 16 years old, at the time, their death shook everyone’s faith in God – everyone except your grandfather.  His faith never wavered”.

She & I talked for a couple of more minutes, & that was it.

As I hung the phone with Ma (without her still having the faintest idea as to what was going on), a peace came over me, for I had just been reminded by my Baba that however it was going to turn out, it was still HIS Will.

I did shut my business & by HIS Grace (& beyond miraculously) I received a phone call from a Corporate entity looking to expand, in the area. We finalized the deal within a couple of weeks, & HE allowed us the Grace to stay with my mother, until she passed in 2017.

 

 

 

 

 

 

One of my closest friends was O. He & I knew each other for over 35 years, having worked in banking, for two separate employers. O was one of the most scientific, meticulous, intelligent people that I ever knew. He had a doctorate in economics & he was one of those people that accepted nothing, unless it could be logically understood & explained. I, on the hand, am an idiot, & the exact opposite!

O & his family came to visit us in 2001. It was the first time in our 30 plus year relationship that all we talked about Babaji & spirituality. We talked for hours, & typical of O he cross examined me, for every minute, of every hour.

I could see from our discussions that O’s mind underwent different phases of reactions. The initial phase was “this guy wore suits & a tie, & attended Board meetings. How can he believe in such superstitions”.

The second phase was “I have known him 30 years. He must have lost his mind, & joined some sort of a cult”.

The third phase was when he started asking me for Babaji stories & we talked about the Miracle of Love & KD’s CD’s. (A side note here. O, at the time, lived in Saudi. He called to ask for a copy of the Miracle of Love & then proceeded to say “it will never reach because the Saudi’s apparently censor any mail that they deem non-Islamic. I somewhat pompously told him to leave it to Babaji. I put it in the ordinary mail the next day, & 2 days after that,  I received a very excited phone call from O to say it had not only arrived, but arrived unopened & untouched, by the censors).

I remember saying to your grandmother that I was seeing the beginnings of Babaji’s hand on O- not sure why, but I thought it was a good thing.

The following few months, where ever O traveled, he found something that would remind him of Babaji – a book, an article, a devotee; in Singapore; London; Sri Lanka; Sandiego…

About a year went by, one day O’s wife called to say he had collapsed in a meeting & had been diagnosed with brain cancer. She said that they were travelling from Saudi to Mayo Clinic & O was asking if it was possible for me to meet them, at Mayo.

The doctors initially told him that they needed to operate immediately or he would die within 3 months. If they did operate, he would lose some of his mental functions, possibly permanently. I walked into a family conversation, about what would be the best option.

O turned to me and asked me for my view. I told him that I was unwilling to give him advice on this issue, because this was entirely personal. He kept trying to push me, but for once in my life, I kept my mouth shut. After a half dozen ‘no’s’, O’s wife turned to me & asked what I would do, in O’s place. I was still hesitant to answer the question, but eventually relented. I remember, I had just started saying “No, I would not have surgery because only Babaji decides, when I die, but until then I need to live with dignity”. Before I could finish my thought, O phoned his doctor to decline surgery.

My heart sank because I knew if O died in 3 months, no one would remember how much I had resisted answering. All they would do is remember that it was because of me, that he did not opt for surgery.

As I was leaving, O hugged me and said to me “Can you ask your Baba to give me a little more time. My daughter will be entering college next year & my son is about 3 years away”. On the flight back I was panic stricken, but by the time I reached home, I was very annoyed at Babaji.

I stood in front of one of HIS photos, in our living room & said to HIM “I know it is you who made me answer, even though I did want to. I do not care what your reasons or what the doctors say. The fact that O asked me to talk to you, is his faith in you. You have now make sure his kids are settled, before he dies”.

O lived 7 plus years.

 

One year, I had wanted to buy a birthday gift for your grandmother. I went to a shop in Edison, NJ (has a very large Indian population) and asked if they had any statues of Hanuman. The lady said that she had only one & she showed it to me. He was broken & HIS face was very different from most Hanumanji’s, I had seen. For the first time, in my life, I did not like a statue of Hanumanji!

I asked her if she had another one but she said no. She tried to sell me other statues of other deities, but I was determined to get a statue of Hanuman. Anyway, I finally gave up & started walking out. I turned around & right in front of us was this statue of Hanuman- a small one. I asked her about it & she looked puzzled because she had never seen it before. Yet it was about two feet from her counter & on a table that I had looked at, when I walked in. Neither of us had seen it. I picked it up & it had a price tag. I took it to her & she pressed some buttons on her computer & then looked at me & said “I do not understand. I have never seen this & it does not show up on my computer!”. I asked her if she would sell it & she eventually did.      

A couple of years passed & one day, I saw our neighbor cutting a tree, that had fallen & carving the stump into the shape of a couple of beautiful eagles. I started talking to him & he told me that he did this for a living. The thought suddenly occurred to me that he may be able to carve a Hanuman for us. I talked to him about it & asked him if he could do so, if I provided him a small model.

I ran home & picked up a small statue of Hanuman that I had bought, in Edison. I did not have the slightest doubt or hesitation as to which statue I would use as a model.

He looked at it, with some fascination & said he would love to do it, because it would be a challenge. He asked me about Hanuman. As I finished telling him, he told me that I should know that he was an atheist. I told him that I did not care because there was a reason that Hanuman had made me approach him. Anyway, he told me that he was busy for a few days but he would get back to me & certainly do it.

Many weeks passed & I never heard from him. I assumed that Hanuman had decided against it & I gave up on the idea. One day, I bumped into my neighbor & he asked whether I was still interested in having the statue made. He also told me that his brother-in-law was really hurting for money & needed the business.

That is the story of the 4/5 feet Hanumanji who sits in our puja room now.

https://preview.redd.it/ota7webspoph1.jpg?width=2576&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6b5a6707ba5b235ef514009e3f5a416bab16e606

 

Babaji used to come to our house, since my father was a child. I had HIS darshan last, in December 1969. I have been addicted since. My father, before me & my grandfather, before him. MY wife & children never saw HIM in body, but by HIS Grace, are more hooked than me.

 

Babaji would always say “if you want to serve God, feed people”. HE introduced the concept of ‘Bhandara’ (pantry of God is the closest translation, I can think of) in the Kumaon mountains. HE would also say that even attending one of these Bhandaras was a matter of Grace – Grace that only Hanuman allows. The Grace of actually being allowed actually cook or serve in these, HE would add, is only allowed to the ‘pure hearted’.

In 1999, KD called to ask if we would be interested in attending a bhandara – he said that some devotees of Babaji hold one every year in MA, & he & Ram Dass would be attending. We were thrilled.

We spoke to the hosts, who were not only kind enough to allow us to attend but they had said that they would also allow my wife to cook. We were most excited. However, little did we know what was to come.

The bhandara was on a Saturday. New Jersey was hit by a massive hurricane (Sandy?) on Thursday night – two days before the bhandara. There was devastation, all over, NJ. Our house basement was completely flooded, & we lived on top of a hill! We were up until 2.30am pumping the water out. When we finished, it occurred to me that I should check on my businesses – especially one that was located near the Whippany River. I drove that night & it took me about 2.30 hours to cover a distance that normally took me 35 minutes or so. I had to park a mile or so from my business & then walk. My business was a child care center, & when I reached it, I found it to be completely flooded. There was devastation – water & sludge everywhere & dead fish in our corridors.

I called your grandmother on my cell phone (which was still miraculously working) & asked her to check if the bhandara was still on. She asked me about the Center & I told her that it would probably close forever because it was completely flooded & we had no flood insurance.

As I hung up the phone, I suddenly found myself very angry at Babaji.

I had tears running down my face & I was asking HIM if this was HIS method of telling me that I am not worthy of attending HIS bhandara. I told HIM that if that was the case, it was HIS fault because HE had known me since birth - & only HE knows how many other births! I told HIM that I was going to the bhandara , even if I have to shut this Center, forever. I also told HIM that my family & I were HIS problem whether we lived in a palace or on the streets. I was still crying & screaming, in an empty building.

At about 7:00am, there was a knock on the front door. When I opened it, there was a man standing with a ‘wet vac’. I had never seen him before in my life. He said that he lived in the neighborhood & his office was closed that day. He came to see if we needed help, cleaning up. There were a total of 44 people that showed up in the next hour & I had never seen any of them before, in my life. In addition, some of my staff had also shown up & I knew then that Babaji had decided that we were going to attend the bhandara.

At 10:30am or so, your grandmother called me, on the cell, to tell me that she had good news – the bhandara was on. I told her that I knew that the bhandara was on & I also knew that this Center would not only re open but do so by Monday. I then told her that there were 44 people who probably do not realize that Babaji sent them, to me.

I reached home about 9:30pm that night. When I reached home, I discovered that your grandmother had tried to drop off our dog to my sister’s house in Princeton but to no avail, because all roads to Princeton were closed. I told her that since Babaji had decided that we were going, I would take a shower & we would head for Princeton.

We all got in our car & headed for Princeton. As we reached Somerville Circle, we found a police barricade & behind the barricade we saw the road flooded. We also saw that some electrical poles had fallen over & were still generating live electricity. The road that we could see - & the one we had to be on – was Route 206. At any rate, we tried other routes & ended up arriving in at my sister’s house after about 3 hours – it normally took an hour.

I was, by now, very tired because I had not slept in two days & had barely eaten all day. Also, we were proposing to leave for the bhandara at about 5.30am. I wanted to get some sleep & I knew that if we had to detour, as we had, on the way to Princeton, I would get no sleep. We therefore decided to take Route 206, despite what we had seen on the way to Princeton.

We were now accessing Route 206 from Princeton & it was clear. We kept driving – expecting sooner or later to hit the police barricade - & noticed that there was not a single other car on the road. We reached Somerville Circle & found no police barricade & no sign of flooding. We reached home in about 45 minutes & went to bed, without thinking much about it. I suppose we assumed that the road had been cleaned up during the three odd hours that we were on the road.

The next morning, we left home early, as planned. I stopped at a local Seven Eleven for coffee & I noticed a local newspaper with the headline – Route 206 to remain closed for at least three days. Route 206 apparently had never re opened & yet we knew that we had been on it!

This was the first, of many bhandaras, that we have allowed, by HIS Grace.

In the summer of 2001, I was going to KD’s house to drop him to the airport. He had become so busy with his travel schedule & I had become somewhat pre occupied with my work. As a result, the only time that we got to meet was on his way to/from an airport. It would give us both an opportunity to refuel, by talking about HIM.

I stopped at a gas station on Route 206, just before Route 80. In those days, I never wore a seat belt – a source of great frustration to wife & my children. However, that day, I had just entered Route 80 & I had this strange feeling in my stomach. I put on my seat belt.

It had been about five minutes; I was travelling on the left lane of Route 80, at a speed of about 65 miles an hour. Suddenly the car hydroplaned & started spinning crossing the lanes on my right. As I spun, I must barely missed hitting at least six vehicles – one of which was an eighteen-wheeler truck. The car ended up spinning into the hard shoulder & the next thing I knew was that I was about to hit the side of a rock – parts of Route 80 have been cut through what must have originally been mountains.

My speed had not reduced & I was within one foot of the mountain. I have no idea how the front of the car missed the mountain ( the one foot was not adequate for it to spin) but I ended up hitting the back side of my car. The impact was such that the car over turned & was thrown back on the highway, upside down. There was a KD tape playing – I think it was the Chalisa. The engine would not shut off & neither would the tape.

I heard people outside but could not make out what they were saying. I only knew that I was alright but I needed to get out. I opened the driver side door & got out. There was a man apparently dialing 911 because he was on the phone & he looked at me and said “wait he is alive & he is walking out. Sir, Please sit down, help is on the way. You must be hurt”.

I told him that I was alright & proceeded back to my car to get my cell phone. This man was dumb founded – “What are you doing, he asked incredulously?”

I told him that I needed my cell to call my wife. He told me not to worry about that but to sit down. He was a paramedic & he was certain that I had internal injuries. I told him that I did not & proceeded to call my wife, to tell her about the accident & tell her that I was alright. I also told her to call KD.

There were six people who were passing by & stopped to help. All were doctors, paramedics or nurses. The ambulance took me to the hospital & I was placed in a room, on a stretcher. From my room, I heard the morning shift of nurses come in to the ward. I heard one of them say – “Did you see that accident on Route 80”? Those people must be toast!”

Someone asked her to be quiet & told her that I was in the next room. A few minutes later the doctor came & informed me that I had been very fortunate. A lot of his staff had passed my car & do not know how I lived. He then informed me that they needed multiple X Rays of my head & my spine because it is fairly common to have internal injuries, in such accidents. He then called his X Ray technician.

The X Ray technician asked me to take off Babaji’s medallion from my neck. As I was taking it off, she asked me if that was my guru? In my mind, I had visions of someone questioning me on the Hare Rama Hare Krishna movement – the last thing I wanted at this time. I told her – with great reluctance – yes.

Her next question was typical Babaji. She asked me if I knew Ram Dass? I smiled & told her that this was Ram Dass’s guru too. She asked if this was Neem Karoli Baba & then proceeded to tell me stories about Babaji. I asked her how she knew & she told me that her fiancé – a college professor – was a devotee of Ram Dass & he keeps telling her Babaji stories. Babaji had once again reminded me - & I suppose this young couple – that it was all HIM. What are the chances of being in a hospital in the middle of nowhere in NJ & the X ray technician talking to me about Babaji?

 She & I got so engrossed in our conversation that she forgot about my X Rays until the doctor appeared at the door. The doctor wanted to fire her, claiming I could have internal injuries & she had been irresponsible. I accepted complete blame for it, & that calmed him down somewhat.

After the X Rays, she came to my room & we talked some more.

The doctor came to see me before I was discharged. He told me that it was nothing short of a miracle that I was alive, let aside unhurt. However, he was prescribing me pain killers as I would be in severe pain the following day. This was because my body had undergone a trauma.

My wife & children picked me up & we returned home that night. My wife spent hours trying to individually pluck glass from my hair & body. I had no pain & only a small cut on my hand.

The next morning, she asked whether I was in pain. I told her that the only pain I had was a pin point pain on top of my head. She parted my hair to look & it seemed inflamed. As she looked closer, she told me that it looked like someone’s thumb print. At that moment, we both looked at each other & smiled.

There was a picture of Babaji that KD had given us. Babaji is lying with HIS hand on top of HIS head & HIS thumb pressed against it. KD had been told that when Babaji had that pose, it signified that we need not worry, it was all going to be alright. My wife could not get over how much the mark on my head looked like a thumb print!

Later that day, she & I started talking about the accident. I told her that the car must have overturned in a manner that destroyed the roof on the passenger’s side because if the roof on the driver’s side had collapsed, my neck would have snapped. We talked about how Babaji must have spun it in a manner that it landed on the passenger’s side but we decided to go see the car.

We arrived at the repair shop, where it had been towed. One of the mechanics came out to offer his condolences & asked if it was a family member. I told him – “yes, sort of. It was me".

“No, no you misunderstand… he said” Anyway, we finally saw the car. The roof had collapsed alright but it was the driver’s side. The windshield & the windows on either side had shattered & the glass was still lying on the driver’s seat. It is a wonder that I came out of the car by opening the front door, for it could no longer be opened!

 

 

 

First, a couple of foot notes:

I vacillated about whether or not I should post this letter. I had made a decision that I would only post Babaji stories, but for whatever reason, I had the need to break that rule, this morning.

I need to apologize because a couple of paragraphs of this has been used by me, in a previous post.

For those who are wondering (& for context), this journal was written decades ago. At the time my kids were very young & I wrote these journals just in case my grandchildren were born, after I die. As it turns out, I never had grandchildren. ‘daane daane pe likha hai, khaneh wale ka naam’ (every grain has the name of the one who gets to eat I, written on it). Baba decides who reads it & what – if anything- he/she gets out of it.

 

My dearest grandchildren,

I am not sure whether I will be fortunate enough to see you, or if & when I do, whether I will be coherent enough to have a meaningful conversation, with you. I do not believe in legacies & I have none to leave, anyway. I have never been one who believes in journals or diaries & yet, I am writing these journals. I am doing so because life’s journey has been kind to your grandmother & me, but the greatest joy we have ever had has been in our relationship with Babaji. I have had an enviable life but if I have one regret, it is that I did not get the opportunity to talk to my grandfather about his experiences with Babaji. It is also that I did not fully utilize the opportunity to do so with my father & grandmother. Nonetheless, the few stories that I heard from my parents & grandmother, as well as the few opportunities I had to meet Babaji, in physical form, brought me tremendous joy. In my own life, it has now become apparent that Babaji has always held our hand. There were a few years, of my life, when I thought that that was not the case. In retrospect, I realize that even in those years, HE never left us – we may have forgotten HIM but HE had gone nowhere. In the recent years, we see HIS hand in every aspect of our lives & it has given us a sense of peace that defies description. These journals will never be adequate in fully describing that joy but I hope it will provide you a small glimpse of what HE has meant to us. 

The fact that you are reading this, I hope, signifies that your father (It is also possible that your mother too but your father is a bachelor at the time that this is being written) has introduced Babaji to you. Babaji is, at the very least, one of the greatest saints that ever walked the face of this earth.

Your grandmother & I have been through the same trials & tribulations in life, as anyone else. We have had successes & failures; we have had tremendous joy & sorrow; we have had total peace & ‘gut wrenching’ worry; we have had material comforts beyond our wildest expectations & there have been occasions when we did not know where the next rent check would come from. All of these have been necessary & important in making us who we are but I recognize now, more than ever, that there is no aspect of our lives - & there never has been – that was not being guided by Babaji. The unpleasant was a necessary aspect of life’s journey – HE gave us strength to bear it & wisdom to deal with it. The pleasant too was necessary but HE taught us that while it was alright to be euphoric; the pleasant & the unpleasant were like passing clouds & nothing more than temporary stops in our journey.

I pray that each of you will be born feeling the way I do but I suspect that even if that is so, HE will make you forget, so that you can fulfill your day to day responsibilities. HE made me forget for almost 18 years of my life but I now realize that if HE had not, it would have been difficult for me to fully function as society demanded. I am sure the question you are asking yourselves is that if Babaji is all that is important, then who cares what society demands.

First of all, never use Babaji as an excuse not to fulfill your responsibilities. HE will not allow you to go to HIM in order to escape from your responsibilities! You must understand that the fact that we took birth implies that we have responsibilities to fulfill & we must fulfill them, in order to proceed on our journey. Also, you will discover that society will only leave you alone if you can first prove to them that you can not only function within its parameters but also succeed. Lastly, your relationship with Babaji will bring you immense joy & therefore it is important that you enter into it, at peace with the world. If you do not, the world will slander Babaji & that you must not allow.

I have also been asked as to why I make an effort to do anything, if I know that Babaji is guiding me. That is a fair question. Firstly, HE emphasized that a true devotee always fulfils his/her responsibilities. Secondly, once I accept that all I do is HIS Will, then I must do it to the best of my ability because HIS name is attached to it. Lastly, the thought that HE is guiding me always took away the stress of negotiation or competition. I always competed & negotiated to win but I did not fear losing, because that too was HIS Will.

You should have no doubt that Babaji is holding your hand, always. I have no doubt that when the time is right, HE will make you aware of that fact. I know this because HE has done this for two generations before me and your parents, after me. In the interim, I hope the enclosed incidents will provide you a small glimpse of what HE has meant, in our day to day lives.

These are being written in no particular order & nor are they being written with any formulated thoughts. Some are being written, as they happen. Others are being written in retrospect. I have no doubt that, by the time you read this, there will be hundreds of books written about HIM & yet none of them will fully capture what HE was, for that is not possible. In my life, I enjoyed reading every publication that talked of HIM, without the author trying to show off his or her own intellect or wisdom.

I write these because Babaji, to me, was the Creator, himself - I am sure that HE is screaming at me for suggesting this, for HE always tried to hide HIS divine form. Our family has been Graced for generations. I do not know why & I do not have the need to know why. It is neither something to be proud of or ashamed of, because it has nothing to do with us. It is the Creator deciding to provide us a window seat, that once in a while allows us to watch HIM play. HE can take it away when HE desires & reintroduce it, when HE considers us worthy or considers it necessary. The Grace is in HIS allowing us to watch. Never take it for granted, nor develop an arrogance because of it, for it appears & disappears at HIS Will. You should view it for what it is – Grace. We are all caretakers in HIS kingdom; whatever we have is on loan to us, by HIM. Therefore, never take your role or what you possess too seriously. IT DOES NOT BELONG TO YOU.

You will realize that once you have recognized that it is all HIS; the method in which you deal with the world will change. You will do the best you can, in everything that you do, because you are serving HIM. HE will take care of the rest & you will never have to worry about rewards for HE will do the worrying for you. Trust me my children for I have lived all over the world & functioned under conditions that most will find inconceivable & the only truth is that ours is no more than a role in a script, already written by HIM.

May you always remain under HIS blanket. May you always be aware of HIS presence, in your lives. May you always be blessed.

All my love

Dadu

 

  

 

 

 

However you rationalized your vote, for Trump or if you still think that he is the best of bad options, what your vote is not about is:

Morality: 28 accusations of sexual molestation; Hollywood tapes; protection of Epstein predators; the countless grotesque posts; fraud conviction (s) or

Patriotism: never served a day himself but John McCain; John Kelly; Mark Milley were losers & veterans who sacrificed life & limb were suckers or

Loyalty: Canada; Mexico; France; Germany; Belgium; UK; Italy; Spain; Denmark; Norway are now adversaries, but Russia, North Korea, Saudi Arabia are worthy of admiration. A litany of senior advisors who went from being the greatest thing since sliced bread, to being thrown under the bus, & becoming scum or

About free markets; low taxes; less government spending, to reduce the national debt; or about limited government, that gives more power to state and local governments. It is also not about rule of law & adherence to the Constitution or

Policies: His economy sucks; we are in yet another never ending war; we are the only country that is still protecting pedophiles; only about 5% of immigrant detainment or deportation are people with prior violent convictions (CATO Institute); US debt has reached a historic $40 trillion; inflation is the highest in decades & manufacturing jobs have not come back to America.

America is not stronger, & the world is not safer: a war that was completely self-created was supposed to end in 2 weeks, has now been on for over 6 months, & no end in sight; there are reports of dwindling ammunitions; low rations & low morale. Our allies are pissed, & Putin; King Jong Un & Xi Jinping are emboldened. America has ceded global leadership.

It is also not about national unity: our country has never been more divided, in my lifetime.

If it is not policies; morality; patriotism; national unity or keeping America strong, that drives you, it must be the:

Misogyny; good people on both sides; the countless self-aggrandizement projects; the blanket pardoning of the Jan 6^(th) insurrectionists & deeming them patriots; the comparing himself to Jesus; the constant need for self-adulation; the insistence on sycophancy; the countless episodes of lack of class; upbringing or etiquette; the separation of babies, from nursing mothers; your neighbors are your cat…

Trump cannot stand for a third term, but if the Republicans still control the House after November, one can almost guarantee that he will not leave the WH. There is no ‘but’, this go around – ‘I do not always agree with what he says, or how he says it but…’.

The November elections are, of course, about our personal freedoms & our democratic principles, but more than that, it is a referendum on who we are as nation. Please make your vote count.

 

 

 

 

A very elderly relative of mine lived in an area of New Delhi called Masjid Moth. One day one of his neighbors came & told him that Babaji had come to someone’s home, in the neighborhood. As they walked into the room, the found a bunch of people sitting on the floor, while Babaji sat on a sofa.

One of the people on the floor was complaining to Babaji that HE Graces the home of his neighbors, but never comes to his home. Babaji giggled & said “I will come, if you invite me, & feed me”. This man looked incredulous & pressed Babaji “when will you come?”. “Whenever you call me”, Babaji responded. The man still looked disbelievingly & asked “will you come for dinner tonight?”. “Sure go home & cook, I will come” Babaji said.

The man was thrilled. He ran home; told all his neighbors, & his wife & he started cooking. Their home was such that the kitchen led to an outside concrete patio, & the patio had a door that opened to a small street, behind the house. They had left the kitchen door & the door, leading to the street open.

Husband & wife were most excited. In walked a stray dog, into their kitchen. The man kicked the dog in the face & shooed him away. The cooking was done; the entire neighborhood had converged but Babaji did not show. After waiting a while, the husband went back to the neighbor’s house, where Babaji sat.

Babaji was still sitting there so the man reminded Babaji that they had cooked all this food; invited all the neighbors, & everyone was waiting.

Babaji turned to him & said. “I came because I was hungry. Don’t you remember, you kicked me in the face”! How can I come again, where there is no love?

Babaji used to come to our house, since my father was a child. I had HIS darshan last, in December 1969. I have been addicted since. My father, before me & my grandfather, before him. MY wife & children never saw HIM in body, but by HIS Grace, are more hooked than me.

It was Sept 2000. We were once again going to the bhandara, organized by two Babaji devotees (Tom & Maggie). KD called the day before & asked if I would mind picking up a friend from NY City. She too wanted to go to the bhandara but had no means of getting there.

We picked her up from her apartment, on our way to Massachusetts. Her name was Jean. This was the first time that we had met & I was somewhat hesitant to ask her how she knew Babaji. In the course of the journey, I started talking about Babaji & of-course. ended up asking as to how she was introduced to Babaji. It turned out that she was too young to have met Baba, in body; she only somewhat knew KD; did not know RD; had never been to India; had no interest in going to India. She was also not interested in spirituality; Eastern philosophies; Hinduism….I asked her why she was going to the bhandara?

She then proceeded to tell us her story. She was a doctor in New York City. Apparently, her practice was flourishing to the point that she was turning away new clients. In the early 1990’s she became critically ill & the doctors decided that she needed a kidney transplant & that she would die, without it. They managed to find a kidney donor & she set up the surgery in a Jewish NY hospital. The day before her admission into the hospital, a friend came & presented her a copy of ‘Miracle of Love’ & talked to her about Babaji. She herself was skeptical of such books & told her friend she may be stuck in a cult! At any rate, she took the book, with some reluctance & much trepidation. She thought that she might read it while she was recuperating.

She had been allotted a room, at the hospital. She placed the book on a table, next to her bed & went in for surgery. After the surgery, she was brought back to her room. Her nurse – a Phillipino lady – asked her if she was Jewish. Jean said no, a little surprised at the question. The nurse apologized & said “I just assumed that you were because I saw your father was Jewish”. Jean did not know what she was talking about.

The nurse explained that a man, dressed in Jewish garb, who looked like the picture on the cover of the book, next to her bed, had sat on the chair in her room, the entire period that she had been in surgery. He sat quietly but did not move, the entire period. He had got up minutes before she was brought back to the room & the nurse had assumed that he was a family member & would be back. That day had changed Jean’s life & since that day, she attends every Babaji event that she can.  

 

 

 

 

Babaji used to come to our house, since my father was a child. I had HIS darshan last, in December 1969. I have been addicted since. My father, before me & my grandfather, before him. MY wife & children never saw HIM in body, but by HIS Grace, are more hooked than me.

My father died at about 5.30 pm on July 3^(rd),1979., in New Delhi. He was 52 years old.

In January of that year, my sister was married & moved to New York. We had not advised her of my father’s illness primarily because there was no illness, as such. The night before my father died, it was the middle of the night in New York & my sister – every time she shut her eyes – saw Babaji. In the dream he kept saying “do not worry, go home”. She did not know what he meant but she felt uncomfortable. She saw this dream thrice & finally woke up her husband & told him that she needed to get out of the house. Despite his protests that it was not a good idea to walk the streets of NYC, in the middle of the night, they did just that. They returned home & to find someone from the embassy with the message, that my father had passed away.

My sister flew to Delhi & was inconsolable. She would not stop crying; she did not sleep or eat for three days. On the third day, she went to do her puja & when she came out, I saw that she was no longer crying. She told me that while she was praying, she was crying & then Babaji appeared & scolded her. He told her to stop crying because my father was sitting next to HIM & he was happy!

The propect of sitting next to HIM, even for a moment is what makes life worth living (yes, I do see the irony in that!).

 

Babaji used to come to our house, since my father was a child. I had HIS darshan last, in December 1969. I have been addicted since. My father, before me & my grand father , before him. MY wife & children never saw HIM in body, but by HIS Grace, are more hooked than me.

I know a lot of people who have never met Babaji in body, & yet their devotion to/addiction for HIM is beyond what I have, in this lifetime. All the books and all the teachings in the world can never give one, that level of devotion.

Conversely, I know many who have met HIM in body & either come away with "yes, HE was a good soothsayer, but now that HE is gone, what is the point" or worse still "HE was an old, fat, crude man".

Journal to my grandchildren continued (2)

Our family has  been Graced for generations. I do not know why & I do not have the need to know why. It is neither something to be proud of or ashamed of, because it has nothing to do with us. It is the Creator deciding to provide us a window seat, that once in a while allows us to watch HIM play. HE can take it away when HE desires & reintroduce it, when HE considers us worthy, or considers it necessary. The Grace is in HIS allowing us to watch. Never take it for granted, nor develop an arrogance because of it, for it appears & disappears at HIS Will. You should view it for what it is – Grace. We are all caretakers in HIS kingdom; whatever we have is on loan to us, by HIM. Therefore, never take your role or what you possess too seriously. IT DOES NOT BELONG TO YOU.

You will realize that once you have recognized that it is all HIS; the method in which you deal with the world will change. You will do the best you can, in everything that you do, because you are serving HIM. HE will take care of the rest & you will never have to worry about rewards for HE will do the worrying for you. Trust me my children for I have lived all over the world & functioned under conditions that most will find inconceivable & the only truth is that ours is no more than a role in a script, already written by HIM.

 

This was a part of a journal I wrote for my grand children, on how Babaji has impacted our family:

!)          Babaji had left an inexplicable influence on my soul, since I was a child. I did not know why & I did not care. All I knew is that it felt good to talk about HIM or listen to stories about HIM. Your grandmother & I were married in early 1981. In the initial years, I spoke of Babaji often, to her. Somewhere along the line, we got busy with our lives & we stopped remembering HIM. I do not know exactly when this happened or why but in the years between 1982 & 1998, I do not recollect thinking of HIM even once. I did not even realize that it had happened.

In recent years, there was a stage in my life when I self pitied myself over that phase of my life. Thoughts of having fallen from grace & Babaji being unhappy were the only explanations that I could find. In retrospect, I realize that it was not possible for me to have become so preoccupied with my life that I forgot Babaji, to the extent that I did. I therefore assume that Babaji made me forget, for whatever reason. The lesson that I have learnt is that even remembering HIM is a matter of Grace, which HE allows. I realize now, that even in those years, a lot happened in our lives that clearly had HIS hand on it – I will narrate some of those stories in this journal too. I guess, at the time, HE felt that the best way I could fulfil my responsibilities was not to recognize that fact. The important lesson was that HE never left even though apparently we had forgotten. 

I think most people that know me will tell you that I seldom took life seriously. I hope the one’s that worked with me or competed against me will tell you that despite that, I was a fierce competitor. The one’s that did not know me therefore probably thought that my ‘lack of seriousness’ was just a show to throw off the competition. The realty – which I hope my friends & relatives knew – was that I did not take life too seriously because I believed life itself was a passing cloud & the role we have been given by HIM is not to be taken too seriously. I was a fierce competitor because of two reasons:

a)    I did the best I could, in everything I did BUT

b)    I was never afraid to lose.

The year 1998 was the worst period of my life, particularly spiritually. It was the only year, that I can recollect, when I did take myself seriously. I caught myself telling people how much I had achieved & what I had created etc.. As these things came out of my mouth, I fell more & more into a state of depression because they were against every ‘grain’ in my soul. I knew this was wrong; I also knew that it was contrary to my being & yet I could do nothing to stop it. I could essentially see myself in a ditch; I knew what it would take to get out of it & yet I could do nothing to do so! I was like an audience to my own life.

In the summer of that year, we all went to India. I was despondent & in turmoil. I returned from India earlier than your grandmother & the children. One night, I was lying in bed feeling particularly despondent. I started thinking of my father & of Babaji – I suppose that I was a child in tears, seeking comfort in the lap of my father. It had not even occurred to me, at the time, that this was the first time I had thought of Babaji in years.

I used to carry a picture of Babaji in my pocket since third grade. When I was old enough to own a wallet, it was in my wallet. The picture had become so old that it crumbled, if you touched it. I had therefore wrapped it in polythene, to protect it. I always knew that the picture was there, even in the years that I had apparently forgotten HIM.

I decided to get up from bed & look at HIS picture. It had disappeared. I turned the house upside down, looking for it but to no avail. I even called your grandmother in India to as if she knew where it was but she did not. When the family returned from India, your grandmother turned the house upside down but also to no avail.

As you can imagine my heart now moved from turmoil to total despair. This was now confirmation that I had fallen spiritually because in my mind, even Babaji had left me. This was particularly distressing because my relationship with HIM was somewhat like that of a spoilt grand child – I love you Grandpa & that is all that I can offer you. I will handle the world with dignity & courage because that is what an adult must do. However, there will be times when I can no longer pretend to be an adult & in those times, I will hide under your blanket & you will take away my pain. The thought that Grandpa was there was itself always enough!

The weeks that followed brought with them pain & pleasure. The pleasure was that the shock of losing Babaji’s picture brought me back on the spiritual path that I was meant to be on. The pain was that for the first time, I felt that Babaji had left me by taking HIS picture away. The months passed with varying amounts of euphoria – at the fact that I had turned my life around & Babaji must be pleased – and moments of depression & guilt that I had messed up enough to make Grandpa so sad that HE had to leave.

 On the 22^(nd) of December, we received a telephone call from your grandmother’s sister - Didi. She and her son, Neil wanted to spend Christmas with us. They live in California. I had last met them in 1998, when they visited us in Hong Kong – it had been ten years. I had met her only a few times in my life, prior to that, because we were always in different parts of the world. I mention this because we did not really know each other well enough to know each other’s likes & dislikes. We certainly had no idea of each other’s view on religion or spirituality.

She brought, with her, gifts for everybody. She offered me a gift wrapped musical CD. I told her that it was kind of her but perhaps she should gift it to someone else because I seldom listen to music. She kept insisting & told me that the person singing  was an  American called Ram Dass & he sings kirtans. I told her that now I was even more convinced that she should give it to someone else, who is into that sort of thing. I did not even listen to kirtan in India & I am highly unlikely to like some ‘Hare Rama Hare Krishna’ nut singing kirtan! Anyway, finally she suggested that I listen to it & if I do not like it, she will keep it.

I opened the gift wrapping & the hair on the back of my neck stood up – the CD cover had a picture of Babaji on it. I asked her how she knew that I knew Babaji. She said “who is Babaji”? She did not know who the old man on the CD cover was, nor the fact that HE was my Babaji !   

We played the CD over & over again. I found myself strangely drawn to it & yet I did not hear one word that the man was saying. I only heard the devotion in his voice. I now felt guilty that I had called him a ‘Hare Rama, Hare Krishna’ nut!

That night I decided that I would find this Ram Dass ( I had still not realized that the singer was in fact Krishna Das). Ram Das was recovering from a stroke but I discovered that he was a well known spiritual guide in America but more importantly he was the first to introduce America to my Babaji. I tried desperately to contact him, in the hope of hearing about his time with Babaji but could not contact him. I was particularly excited because I thought there were only a handful of us in India that knew Babaji. I had no idea of HIS following in the US. I therefore decided to type Neem Karoli Baba, on the internet.

I found 11256 sites. I could not believe it. I was like a child in a chocolate shop who had been told to help himself, without having to pay for it. I went from site to site & tried to print everything but none of the sites would allow me to print. I finally called my son, Arjun & asked him to check if there was something wrong with my printer. The printer was fine & yet none of Babaji’s sites allowed me to print. I finally came to a site which only had a picture of Babaji – no other writing. I pressed print, expecting that I would not be allowed to, & miraculously it printed. I printed two copies – one was given to Didi & the other was placed in our ‘pooja’ room. I realized that this was Babaji’s method of returning my photograph, of HIM.

The following morning, I got on the internet early to see the sites that I had yet to see. However, when I typed in Babaji’s name, I found only six sites & the one with HIS photograph had disappeared. The thousands of others that I had found only a few hours earlier had apparently ceased to exist! I have since never found more than a handful of sites.

I was however still keen to try & find Ram Dass. Didi told me that she had a friend in California who knew him & she would call him to find out how to contact Ram Dass. It was only when we called him that we discovered that the singer was Krishna Das & not Ram Dass. He did however give us Krishna Das’s email & in the months that followed, I got to meet & know Krishna Das but more importantly discovered our ‘satsang’ in the US. The years that have followed have been the happiest of our lives. Babaji has reminded us time & again of HIS hand, in our lives.

 

I was brought up to be suspicious of so-called holy men, because out of every 1 that is a genuine Sant, there are countless who are frauds. Having said that, I have had the Grace to meet some genuine & great Saints, but Babaji was beyond this Universe.

HE used to just show up at the house of my paternal grandfather, when my father was a very young. I saw HIM last in December of 1969 & my grand mother was alive, at the time. She had always wondered how HE looked the same, always, even though she herself had seen HIM for over 50 years. When HE came, HE ate; sometimes HE slept; mostly HE was given a new dhoti to wear, so HE changed & left HIS old one at our house. Always, people started arriving within minutes of HIS arrival.

I have no idea why my recollections of HIS visits are so vivid. I also do not know why the smallest of details of these visits are inscribed in my heart. I was only 13 years old, the last time I saw HIM in physical form. I can only assume that my recollections are also HIS doing.

The crowds that came to see HIM were always diverse. There were the young; there were the old; there were the rich; there were the poor; there were the VIP’s & then there were ‘average joe’s’. They appear to have come for different reasons.

Some came merely to get a look at HIM & touch HIS feet. Their faces reflected a joy beyond description at just being able to do that. Some of them reflected that joy even though it appeared that they were seeing HIM for the first time. You should have seen their faces when HE gave them ‘prasad’.

There are others who came with personal agenda’s – their promotion at work; their child’s job or exam; their daughter’s marriage; wanting children or grand children; wanting money or wanting to know their future.

Then there appear to be those who could not decide whether they were being privileged by the meeting or whether Babaji was! The so called VIP’s & others who came to see HIM because they simply could. It was almost as if they wanted HIM & the other people to recognize how special they were. In retrospect, I realize how fortunate we were that HE allowed us to see the divinity in HIM, for there were many people who came & went without realizing that they had just met God!

At these gatherings, HE would sit & the people would surround HIM. He would then start flinging fruits as ‘prasad’. HE flung these with pin point precision & I can only wonder how many people realized at the time that they were being physically fed by the hand of God! HIS arms were far too long, for HIS body. HIS joints seemed non existent because HE appeared to bend every joint beyond what was biologically possible. HIS head was constantly moving & HE had a perpetual toothless grin on HIS face.

 

There were people constantly asking HIM questions about their future or that of the world & HIS answer was always ‘How do I know’? While HE was avoiding the answers to all the questions being asked of HIM, he was muttering the name of RAM & addressing other people in the crowd & telling them their future, all at the same time.  

 At the time, I was young & I thought my fascination to be around HIM was to see a grown man, with no teeth, constantly giggling & telling people their future. I also always enjoyed my father’s interaction with HIM because it was apparent that my father had unconditional love for HIM & blind faith in HIM but insisted on pulling HIS leg, every time they met. The standard exchange between them would be that Babaji would say something to my father & my father would react by asking “Babaji how do you know”? Babaji would giggle & say “I have a wireless with God”! In retrospect, I realize my fascination with HIM had little to do with me or HIS interaction with my father or anyone else but more to do with Babaji planting the seeds in my heart, so that I would recognize them, when the time was right. 

Someone, recently asked me what it was like to be around HIM. As a child, all I remember was that it was great fun. As I replay those meetings in my mind, I feel differently today – Here was a man who did not look like any other Sadhu that I had seen or met; HE did not sound like any saint that I had met – HIS language was often colorful;  HE did not have the same hang ups as most other Sadhus that I had come across – most have severe restrictions about where they will eat, who will cook it etc. HIS devotees did not fit into any pattern either – they were rich, they were poor; they were Hindus, Muslims. Christians, Jews, Sikhs & even the atheists who often did not even realize that they had been drawn. There were the VIP’s & the dacoits, all in the same room. HE preached nothing & yet HIS devotees were constantly learning. HE met no pattern; HE fit no description & yet, from where HE sat, he was telling the kitchen what HE wanted cooked; HE was telling an eight year old what he would be when he grew up; HE was scolding someone else about a recent lapse of judgement; addressing someone else about a concern that he/she was yet to express & probably dealing with creation elsewhere in the Universe, all at the same time. The answer to every question was still “How do I know?”.  HE defies description & HE does so on purpose.

There was nothing you could give HIM, & there was nothing that was ever beyond HIM.