My Roast of Shane Gillis
Disclaimer: I just started watching roast battles a couple months before I watched Shane host the Roast of Kevin Hart. I wrote my own roast of him. Tell me in the comments what you would say at a Roast of Shane Gillis.
Here we go,
Every Pennsylvanian man has two outfit styles: one for the summer and one for the winter. For shane, this would be his basketball shorts or the track suit. But the only running he does is mouth. Hey Shane, don't forget ab day.
Shane is so phenomenal... and big. He is phenomenally big. when he was born, He was 3 kevin Harts tall.
Speaking of Kevin Hart, Shane spent so much of the roast on the fabulous Sheryl Underwood. It is true. Sheryl is a widow. But let's talk about Shane's widow peak with his Calliou lookin ass. Shane's widow peak on his tall ass is steeper than Mt. Everest.
🎵🎶 his widow peak ain't got shit on me
His widow peak ain't got shit on me
'Cause I'm on top of the world
I'm on top of the world, yeah 🎵🎶
Shane has two things in common with Charlie Brown. His hair and his failed football aspirations.
Shane is so racist that his brown hair looks like it is trying to runaway from his master.
Shane is so generous. He supports his family. That's the least he can do when his whole set is on Phil.
Shane likes to date blonde women. And help them, too. A girl call calls him up and asks him to come over with a ruler to measure how long she sleeps each night.
Shane figured out the length of her sleep is 3 kevin Harts long. She is a light sleeper. She takes little naps.
Cheers to Shane.