When does the imposter syndrome go away?
I’ve been working as an EMT for a year now, first on an IFT ambo, but for the most part in an ER, then moved states and went to a Level 1 ER. I know how to do my job, and I’ve not done anything that endangered someone’s life or harmed anyone, but I keep finding myself after shifts feeling like a fraud. Maybe it’s cause I’m new and there’s so much to learn and experience and it feels like every day I am approached with something new. But it feels like every time I start to think I’m getting the hang of it BOOM a situation occurs or something happens where I feel like I’m back at square one because I didn’t know something or had never done something before.
It is definitely taking a toll on me. Some days I feel like a rockstar and that I learned and succeeded so much on a shift. Then the next one I feel like I have no idea why they hired me. I know I’m thinking in dramatic terms- I’m not going to be fired for not knowing how to do something I’ve never done before or had the situation to learn it, or not knowing where a specific niche supply was that is used twice a year. But for anyone that’s been in the gig for a long time, does it ever fade? I’m sure over time I’ll be more comfortable and have adjusted to know so much more. But I’d love to know that at some point I’m going to at least have steady confidence in myself and this itching feeling of actually not knowing shit (which is true, in the grand scheme of things as I’m literal a fresh EMT) might go away. Or at least advise on how to deal with it when it comes so it doesn’t linger and damage the confidence and comfort I have built over the past year.