Recently diagnosed with autism, need help with treatment and bills, dealing with severe suicidal ideation and executive dysfunction
Hi, I'm a 21F brazilian, I've been dealing with suicidal ideation for a long time, but only recently I've got properly diagnosed with autism. I'm diagnosed with ADHD since i was 16, but I deal with severe suicidal ideation since I was 12.
I survived four attempts.
I used to work as an english teacher, but i got fired last month since I couldn't keep up with my progress because life with audhd + cptsd is just too much.
I've raised myself completely alone, I have no family I can count with, and i need help with ANY amount of money so I can get a psychiatrist and ADHD meds just so I can complete basic tasks.
It's been a month since I can't even wash my clothes, I struggle to do basic stuff, can't socialize, can't brush my teeth twice a day, can't stop thinking about dying. In fact, I've been writing my suicide letter, it's been even more difficult after i was diagnosed with autism.
I'm a med student who can't go to classes anymore because of this depression episode and I might have to take an academic break so i can try to force myself to work, but deep down i know i just can't hold any job for more than a month.
And now, the idea of working, of being outside and dealing with my social anxiety and sensory issues is just too much, I can't even take care of myself properly, I'm not capable of working anymore.
I can prove both conditions and give the details, but please, help me, give me a chance, I'm very solitary in real life, and I just reached my lowest this time.