Struggling w church and worship
How do you return to church after decades away?
My backstory is i left the church and the christian faith after high school and didnt return until God called me back a few years ago (im 48)
My problem is that i want to attend church but always find something i disagree with or that i dont like about them all. Some are too intimate some are not intimate enough, some are too loud and in your face.
it feels fake in comparison to how i interact with jesus on a daily basis. How do you avoid feeling like that or is it perhaps because i have a lense that has been on the outside for so long?
I get to church on sunday and all of my decades of doubt and intellectualizing come back and i start arguing with the points in the sermon etc.
in my head. During worship i cant enjoy it because its not music i know ir like.
Its the opposite of a joyous feeling. How can i change this? Has anyone else been away for this long and found a way to return to church again?