To every physician, particularly EM Bros, spending today beneath fluorescent lights instead of fireworks: thank you for keeping our country alive while the rest of us celebrate it. May you find your own moment of celebration when the day is done. May God bless America.
“Erythematous” has exactly 12 letters and 5 syllables. RED got 3 letters and 1 syllable. Imagine the amount of space you can save in textbooks and SOAP notes by this. Save trees, bros. My Orthobro brain hurts seeing y’all Pulitzer hard on these notes.
The FIFA SOCCER😝 World Cup is in full swing, and so is clinical life.
We’ve been getting pictures of residents bumping onto national team players when they grab lunch outside on our group chats. So exciting. Have y’all been keeping up with most games? Because all I hear in the break room is our television with commentary. And it has been getting pretty heated out here between some of the attendings and residents.
I have no idea why there is so much heat though, when these are some facts/laws of universe we need to incorporate in our GME training:
Did you know Messi is the G.O.A.T. and C. Ronaldo needs to AI photoshop himself holding a WC trophy by the way he played today? Did you know TeamBrazil is ready for another 7-1 from Germany, who is actually ready to double up with 14-1 this time. I think FIFA just wants to hand the WC trophy to Argentina, but they are just being nice and letting others have their fecund chance at qualifying for next round. I mean really, like just think: Belgium’s “golden generation” has been eligible for Medicare for the last three tournaments. The Netherlands are one of the best teams nobody wants to play and one of the most cursed teams to support. England is “bringing football home,” but the destination and arrival date remain under investigation. Egypt fans are still filing paperwork to clone Salah. C’mon, y’all; go back to the floors, because the WC literally has Argentina engraved on it. ¡VAMOS ARGENTINA!🇦🇷
May you spend this Eid al-Adha day surrounded by people you love. I am aware that some residents do not end up having Eid day off. To everyone spending Eid in scrubs instead of traditional clothes: your sacrifice is seen.
Your intention matters the most, and your service carries divine blessings. Love you all.
P.S.: I know the meat dishes are going to be extra spicy today! YUM.
I’m sure most GenZ’s are still surgery residents/trainees (or just becoming one), but I love you all.
Aside teaching me what cap, drip, and benching means: you have taught me that your generation is not gonna take the toxic sh-t boomers like us went through on the surgery floor.
Every time I hear our surgery manager sulk about the PGY-1s talking about balance and needing a mental health break (“fck’s that sh-t supposed to mean”), I get a villainous satisfaction in my heart; what a kick I get. Idk why. FYI, yes availability matters in surgery, but I can attest to the fact that the interns are doing great while not sucking up to anyone. KEEP THAT UP, KINGS AND QUEENS. You guys are biting the snake tails real good in this game of snake and ladder.
And teach this boomer more words. You guys are cool.
—Guy who went to med school when George Washington was President.