u/idcimJo

theres a weird double standard! …..
Not excusing any of jax’s actions and what he has done to ribbit , but if people are gonna say

- “he just needs to grow up and talk to someone about his feelings”

you should also say the same thing about her . she “ could have reached out “, just like yall are saying about jax…. but no… apparently nobody can say that because

- “its not that easy to open up / they were afraid to reach out because-…“

holding your hand when i say this ….
everything is not 100% his fault . 😃 but i respect that you dislike him .

i dont blame goose for anything lets make that clear now !

i actually thank her pretty much for confirming some of my … thoughts ill just say it like that .

i swear im not trying to sound bitter …

but i hate when i see people say
“just get help”
“just write a fan fic”
“parasocial”

look , you’re a healed person but thats fine , ig you’re above me . and im not the type of person to knock someone off their high horse

that fine if you liked the ending, but i didn’t, and its put me at rock bottom , if you’ve seen any of my post , you know how i feel about the finale already .

im tired, i dont have the drive to draw anymore , i definitely wouldn’t build a good story and get it as much attention as she did even if i were to try
i also am tired of seeing “well you’re just interpreting the story wrong” no , i just didn’t take the same thing from the story as you did . and that’s just fine . we dont share the same life experiences nor trauma ..

i want to apologize to everyone about this incident.. simply because im a mod and i feel its the right thing to do . we don’t condone this type of behavior, and i , aswell as the rest of the team will make sure nothing like this ever happens again .

do what you guys need to be at peace . i respect your decision.

this is a safe space where people who are trying to cope with jax’s abstraction, can relate to him on a serious level, and dont want people to judge them for liking the character .

thank you for your time :).

if i came off as rude or something bothers you dont be afraid to open your mouth 🫩

https://www.reddit.com/r/SavingJax/s/MJtLA2q8wO

(a lot of you that are here arent part of our community, so ofc you dont know what im talking about , just ask nicely for the link , dont be rude next time )

This has been bothering me !

(not necessarily directed to anyone this is just my take )

“The reason why they are in denial or upset, is because they feel they cant relate to him without some mf saying
"maybe you should look deeper into your sexuality"
there are a LOT of cis men that go through what jax went through and arent trans or gay.

every male that has toxic masculinity / trouble clocking in with his feminine side is not confused about their identity , they were just taught being feminine makes them look like a bitch.

its worse for transfems because thats what they want for themselves, they like more feminine things and are abused for it

so on one end

one is proving “ HEY IM NOT FEMININE “ in some of the most … uncanny ways possible trying to prove how masculine they are and suppress their femininity (in most cases)

on the other hand
“…. why cant i just be accepted for who i am, be comfortable in my own skin ”in a sense , and it causes them to suppress those feelings and hate that part of themselves because it makes them different, feeling unheard and unsafe. (someone could probably explain it better)

same trauma , can cause the same effects, but the motives are completely different.

I hate when i see comments of them genuinely trying to explain why and they get attacked and or called transphobic, i get when yall go hard on the hate comments but ... not EVERYONE is being rude about it. let people have their head-canons dude ...

goose said you can use any pronouns for them. this argument should be over with .
unless you see someone being just straight up hateful about it, then yea, cause id be saying something too.

but harassing them because “i dont see them as trans/ never thought it / show didnt do a good job at representation” Bro NOBODYS being transphobic when they say that

if yall were not so quick to call cis men… gay or .. tell them they might be trans when they know theyre not is whats upsetting them , you cant just tell someone who they are because of their struggles.

theres so many men that struggle with masculinity/femininity , and it has nothing to do with their sexuality and or gender … where are they ? ask the deadbeats , the !ncels, ask that one ex boyfriend that never told you why yall broke up .. they’re everywhere..

in the end we are all human , being mean, toxic, not wanting to understand and empathize/sympathize with others isnt gonna fix this problem, its what got most of us , others , and jax where we are in the first place

jax being trans isnt an “excuse”…..no trauma is an excuse, its an effect. and a lot of people seem to misunderstand that. “

but in order to get the RESPECT yall want back from cismen/ciswomen… stop slapping labels on them and telling them they should “experiment “ with themselves….

they dont respect us because you dont respect them . and cussing them out because they don’t understand or they feel like they cant relate when in all seriousness its kinda our fault .. and ima be the one to say something since all yall do is argue on this damn app ..

and dont come for me in these comments,

i am gender-fluid, pansexual .. so im not being -phobic about nothing. this argument is just stupid and im tired of yall acting like YALL aren’t accepted .

i could understand if someone was being transphobic , but most of them are not ..

but ive seen this the most “i feel like i cant relate because im not trans”

THAT IS NOT FUCKING HATE!!! FOR CHRIST SAKE OPEN YOUR EYES! THEY ARE SAYING THIS BECAUSE EVERYTIME A MALE FEELS FEMININE OR LIKES FEMININE THINGS YALL THINK THEY ARE FUCKING GAY 😭

im probably the gayest you can get on both ends of the pole and i still understand this , holy yall just try to argue and not read , most of these people are very accepting, they just feel like they cannot relate because they are afraid of being told “you might be -“

and if you feel some type of way about it youre the problem, you cant tell other people how they feel and what they are .

(unless i said something incorrect, like really wrong , then i will admit it , but i just wanted to leave this here, cause honestly this shit is annoying, and yall wanna throw “media literacy” around in every argument, knowing youre wrong af .🫩 )

(too large to fit in the tent 💔)

my closest friend is no longer walking this earth because of this because of me i wasn’t enough i wasn’t there. i should have pried more.. there were too many people against her, reminds me of how now like 99% of the fanbase absolutely hate and despise jax now.

1 person (me) trying to do the best i can getting them to open up and see everyone isnt all bad and that things could be better, vs everyone else just throwing in her face thats shes a “bad person” doing hard drugs , running away from home due to abuse, self sabotaging, harming herself….while we are both actively trying to learn how to be a better people since we trauma bonded over a lot due to me going through most of that aswell with my mother and non present father, sexually abused by close family members at a young age…, we were taking those big steps together .

and just like i see people do with pomni people still hold a grudge against me because i was “comforting an abuser” no im comforting someone who is grieving , about to give up on themselves , that is actually destroying their life due to an toxic environment .
anyone that says “he should just d!3” or “abstract” because youre so perfect and you wouldn’t care if your friends were self sabotaging doesnt mean other people dont . Change doesnt happen in a day .. it takes time for people to grow .. and not all can do it alone . i couldn’t, she couldn’t , and im failing at it now.

Then something happened.. and . she ODs.
I wasn’t there . i pushed her away , couldn’t trust her due to my own insecurities.

…After she passed i was even more,… closed off . Im still isolating and its still hard to make any good friends because everyone feels so fake compared to her, everything with her felt genuine, respectful boundaries, she always apologized if she hurt me ,…. i never held a grudge no matter what she did because i saw there was more to her , no matter how much we fight fuss … cuss each other out . but i just couldnt trust her .

i cant trust anyone .its bound to be broken.

i still continuously push people away and not let them in because i found out the hard way nobody gives a fuck , and this series was hard concrete truth , the “criticism” the die hard jax haters and the people that decided to hate him more after ep 9 made it even more clear to me that its just betrer to take yourself out of this world instead of “try” to get better , because if youre already to far gone nobodys gonna care if youre trying to be a better person. they wont even notice what you do and dont do differently because they hate you more than slugs hate salt.

no one was there for her .. someone had to be … even if i couldnt save her. Even if i couldn’t trust her
i was still there . for some fucking reason i was still there , even though i was going through it myself

jax and ribbit reminds me SO MUCH of me and my best friend… may she rest peacefully.

the first thing they say to a person thats struggling with depression and actively grieving , just because they dont have a healthy coping mechanism to just go offline. “your trauma isnt even that bad / its not an excuse”
thats so wrong and you know thats not what it is you know damn well understanding ≠ excusing ….and that doesnt make you better than said person you are trying to judge. making it seem as you are above them. you’re not helping.

you all act like people don’t have negative responses to trauma ,

Perfect fucks . got your life all pretty and wrapped up in a gift box with a big nice pink bow on the top , good for fucking you .

i tried to save this person’s life , while not wanting to be here myself. i didnt bash her about her trauma .. tell her it “wasnt as bad” i didnt tell her “oh just open up yo people you trust “ i didnt say “oh well i dont wanna be here either deal with it”
“theres plenty other people who feel like thaf” SHUT UP .

It’s easier said than done . if you arent gonna help , and just “criticize “(mock/bully) and tell those people how bad of a person they are .. theyre “irredeemable “ that they will never get better and theyre too far gone .. dont try to feel bad for any of those that suffer or do go through with those harmful thoughts…youre an addition to the problem , youve caused enough pain and you dont get to grieve.

everyone else pushed them further to their breaking point , you dont have to forgive, but not having the respect to try and understand why a person may react in a way is crazy . half of yall know and continues to say “oh we dont care your friends are deceased “ tell that to someone in real life who literally lost part of themselves due to loosing everyone around them , abuse as an child.. any thing that caused them to spiral negatively , i BET you wont walk into a funeral service and tell that to anyone grieving, or walk into a mental hospital with a mega phone and shout “we dont care about what happened to you in life you should just —- , youre too far gone and cant be helped”
once again not saying you have to like him , and im not defending his actions , defending≠understanding

he is making bad decisions , as well as my best friend did we both did, but one thing i do see that doesn’t make it better is ignoring their pain and making their feelings seem as if they’re invalid , not allowing them space to think and feel those emotions alone… it only makes them treat you worse , and doesnt make you any better than them . and it causes them to think the behavior is helping them when its not .you have to let it flow naturally . trust is earned . not forced . and you cant be upset someone doesn’t trust you either, that would make them trust you even less …

i dont wanna be here … if i were to cut the line, people would cry and with they could have done more… when in reality they never cared, never tried to see my pain , understand it
They just get mad that i dont trust in them , dismiss my feelings , get angry at me for pushing them away and try to force me to talk when i want to be left alone . use what they can against me. my pain , my identity…
.. just demonized me for it and it didnt make me want to do anything but dig myself deeper into this hole im in .

im either too masculine to be a girl or im a whore for wanting to try on cute clothes .
too boyish when i wanna wear baggy clothes, but a “skank” when i wanna be pretty . Its always
“girl or boy today transformer!?😃”
“ what are you ?🤨”
“ nobody’s gonna want to be around you ”
“too loud”
“too quiet”
“too mean”
“too nice”
“asshole”
“jerk”
“disgrace”
“b!txh”
“brat”
“you cry too much”

“selfish …you dont care enough”

its never

how do you feel jo?….

people dont see nor care until its too late, if they do they “criticize” berate you for not being strong enough, tell you “just get over it”, “just then its “we didnt know/we tried to help ”

even still .. at the end of the day people couldnt give a shit if you were d3ad or alive . people dont really care about mental illness, struggling with your identity , how you feel in general. they’d rather throw you in a hospital dose you up, say everything’s okay and lock you in a room with those same thoughts that consume you . feed you pretty little lies and throw you back into the world .. then you realize . Nothing ever changed

“irredeemable”…”too far gone”.. youre. right , we get proven right every time. i get proven right every time. i’m just not worth it .

no matter how anyone twist it no matter what message you feel this story sends …
it just says

“you cant control your emotions?, you cant trust people?, you cant mask hard enough for people to think you’re okay ? you cant just reach out to people ? its not so hard …you dont wanna live ? okay then we cant help you , R o t . everyone else would be happier without you making their lives miserable” and thats exactly what happened. thats what it portrays..
and im sick of people saying that its not. when it was just shown to you on a big screen

i hate myself. i hate you jo .

i let her hurt me , i let her push me away .. respecting that she needed space, she thought i didnt care , she thought i was just … there to use her get into her head because…i told her i couldn’t trust her no matter what she did that it wasnt in my nature because i was prepared for her to stab me in the back just like everyone else, the day we argued i told her i didnt consider anyone a friendand not to take what i say personal , i consider noone trustworthy …when i told her you just wanted to lie in bed , no go out , not do anything with her, that id rather put myself to rest than to trust a soul ever again .

she came to my house .. one last time and we sat on the roof 1:43 am .
swe sat in silence and smoked a blunt together .. and said 4 words before she lett “i love you jo.“ she left after that . a week later i figured out she had departed this earth without you even being able to apologize. without making it right, without you telling her you loved her back , youre a coward .

if you would have just said something to her maybe…maybe shed still be alive and wouldn’t have done that to herself …

if you would have just stayed longer with him jo , maybe your grandpa wouldn’t have passed from a heart attack right after you left his house that late night . you left him alone .

if you would’ve told her not to go to that new years celebration or if you just .. went with her, maybe she wouldn’t have got hit by a fucking Dodge Ram 2500 with all terrain tires at almost 90mph . you didnt say anything…

maybe you should of just did something, instead of lie there cry and scream like a bitch and let that person take advantage of your body.… youre weak jo ..

yes , maybe you do deserve to rot in hell jo , maybe you dont deserve redemption.

thanks a lot for letting me know i don’t deserve forgiveness , i dont deserve redemption , to all the fucking hate subs out there , to those of you who beileve i deserve the same fate , thank you, youre slowly making your mark on the world . i appreciate you for telling me , showing me everything my brain has already screamed at me x10.

it should have been me .

you story doesnt hold any weight. nobody cares to feel or understand you .
if the only way you could save the day , and or redeem yourself is to give in , to let yourself go . if thats the only thing that could put ear to ear smiles on people’s faces so be it . do it . youd be doing people a huge favor

it should be me .

its want they want , a world full of perfect people , with perfect lives, emotions, feelings, you aren’t fit for this life
you’re irredeemable, you’re the villain, youre a monster. and you cant never come back from that . People will forever hate you for that one mistake you made

Jax couldnt forgive himself, nobody could forgive him , nor will anyone forgive you , love you , care for you ,they hate you. and forever will .

Just like Jax.
your fate is sealed jo.

when i do lie to rest , laugh , celebrate , parade around my departure like you all have done for Jax .

Keep that huge disgusting grin on your face .

id just be another lost cause , another horrible , irrelevant, irredeemable, pos thats no longer walking this earth , at least people would be happy with me for once.

- jo