CHS isn’t always clear. CVS and my story to sobriety.
I am 183 days sober from smoking weed.
I really never thought I would get to a point of not smoking ever again. Hell I even figured out how to smoke when I was in different countries. In the times I’d stop smoking for up to a couple weeks my withdraw was never very serious, mostly just a loss in appetite for a couple days. I always thought I could quit if I wanted to, but that there wasn’t any reason to since it wasn’t interfering with my school performance or personal life. Still, I never really wanted to come to terms with my emotional/social attachment to pot though. That’s the side of substance dependency most people like to avoid.
My background:
I grew up in a pot growing family, and became a daily smoker by 14. For almost nine years I smoked weed heavily. Bong rips mornings, afternoons, and nights. A period of rolling up to 8 blunts a day. Dabs. Carts. Joints.
For me it was both medicinal and social. I struggle with anxiety, depression, chronic pain, etc that made me turn to smoking. As my mental health worsened I would smoke more. I always preferred sativa dominant strains because it made me feel energetic, happier, and more capable of getting through the day. Growing up in California meant it was a big social activity for me and my friends too. I was also a straight A student with a good head on my shoulders so I never saw any issue with my daily use, and eventually neither did my parents who also smoke daily.
Where my journey to CHS diagnosis begins:
When I was in high school there were maybe 2 instances when I was hung over and cyclically vomited for hours. I just thought those were bad hangovers, but they were probably an early warning sign of CHS.
About 5 years ago I got my belly button pierced and I passed out for the first time in my life. On my way home I ended up throwing up and that triggered another cyclical vomiting event. That moment was a turning point for my awareness that something was changing with my health. A few months later I passed out again, and was starting to become concerned that there was something seriously wrong.
Over the course of those past five years I had episodes of cyclical vomiting, resulting in hospitalization, roughly twice a year. Each and every episode it was not directly linked to pot smoking, so I didn’t make the connection. (Nor did I want to). Sometimes it was car sickness turned cyclical vomiting, hangovers turned cyclical vomiting, medication/anesthesia turned cyclical vomiting. Basically each trigger was random/ not smoking related at all. Sometimes it would even be 12+ hours or even days after the last time I smoked.
TW: emetophobia (description of episode in paragraph below)
Each of my episodes would last 6-12+ hours with vomiting every 10-30 minutes to the point where I’d eventually empty all my bile and just dry heave. I would get sick, become cold, lie down, get hot, get sick again. It would become so painful and excruciating that I would be wailing in the hospital begging for help. Doctors would administer up to the allowed dose of zofran and it wouldn’t work sometimes. They’d give me a cocktail of migraine meds, anti-anxiety meds, and nausea suppressant and it wouldn’t still continue for hours. Even during the start of episodes if I’d take zofran as soon as possible it wouldn’t kick in fast enough before the next cycle hit. I became a pro at managing the episodes and doing what I could to make it stop. No water for at least an hour after the last time I get sick. Ice chips to start after over an hour. BRAT diet for next 24-48 hours. But so frequently I’d still end up in the hospital due to dehydration.
I never once got nauseated or sick directly after smoking weed. This is the biggest reason it took me a long time to come to terms with this diagnosis (and I honestly still am). People that I knew that ‘clearly’ had CHS were those that threw up/ greened out right after smoking. I always wrote it off as something else because I wasn’t informed that cyclical vomiting can still be a result of CHS hours, days, weeks after last smoking.
I naturally developed emetophobia because of the trauma of these episodes. I start to panic when I get nauseous, or if I’d see someone else get sick. I was very fearful but also too young and turnt to commit myself to lifestyle changes (lol).
I was so embarrassed and humiliated each time it got to the point of hospitalization. Especially when alcohol was the trigger and I’d only had 2-3 drinks. I knew I could handle my liquor (I don’t get drunk easily at all) so I’d always feel blindsided by the disproportionate reaction my body was having. I felt immense guilt and shame because of the burden it placed on my parents, and occasionally friends. The attitude from doctors made it worse too. Like I was some idiot who got over served. I felt like they never listened to me and it always bothered me when they’d say it was CHS and I’d have to explain I didn’t smoke that night, or it was hours/days after smoking. Nobody cared to explain to me how complicated CHS was.
I was also told a lot of conflicting information that made me further reject the idea of it being CHS. Since the episodes were sporadic and I’d end up going to different hospitals I was told a lot of other theories. I was told it could be a form of stomach migraine. I thought this was a likely answer since I do experience migraines sometimes. I was told CVS (cyclically vomiting syndrome) can sometimes be idiopathic. I would just experience this sometimes for no apparent reason. I thought that was possible too, since I’d always had a sensitive stomach, extreme vulnerability to motion sickness etc. and the episodes appeared random with different triggers. (Like I would drink more heavily one night and wake up totally fine, but then one night a year would trigger an episode). It was hard to pinpoint.
My last episode was on Thanksgiving. Too much food, a couple drinks, and smoking earlier in the day. I threw up at home for 5 hours and ended up in the hospital at 4am, determined for this to be the last time. After years of suffering and questioning things on my own, I was finally able to arrange an appointment with a gastroenterologist. The appointment was set for February of this year so I decided I wanted to go into that appointment with several possible triggers contained. So I started to wean off smoking and drinking so by the time the new year started I could fully abstain from both. By the time I had my appointment I was over a month without drinking or smoking.
My appointment with the GI is when FINALLY a doctor properly explained the nuances of CHS to me. She explained that CVS doesn’t have to come immediately after smoking, and that rather the various causes (drinking, meds, car rides) are triggers for the underlying destabilization of my vomiting reflex (caused by cannabis).
She told me that it would need to be at least 6 months no smoking for cannabis to no longer be in my bloodstream and for her to make a proper diagnosis. Basically if I cyclically vomited after that point then maybe it was something other than CHS. I slowly started drinking (socially, 1-2 drinks on occasional weekends) again and never got a crazy cyclical vomiting episode again. I’ve thrown up in a normal way twice from drinking since I quit smoking. (by normal I mean one and done rather than disproportionate and endlessly). I haven’t been hospitalized since Thanksgiving.
I’m officially two days over the 6 month mark and I think it’s safe to say it was in fact CHS. I haven’t had my follow up appointment yet (expensive, health insurance changes, the fact it takes months to schedule) but it became clear within 2 months of stopping smoking that weed was in fact the underlying cause.
I reallyyyy hated to admit it, and it’s still hard when I live in such a pro-pot family and surround myself by stoners. But it’s gotten a lot easier. Now I think about my health first and I no longer miss or crave it as much. Ive already gotten through some challenging days. My first birthday in years without smoking. I even attended 420 as a sober person lol. I guess I still hope that maybe some day in the future I could smoke on special occasions but I definitely don’t see myself ever going back to smoking in the way I used to. I’m also okay with the possibility of never going back to smoking either.
I know this is such a TLDR ass post but if you did read, thank you. I hope this at least reaches one person who might be in a similar situation who maybe continues to disbelieve the possibility of it being CHS because they were uninformed on how it truly works or how long it can stay in your system and be triggered by other things.
Anyways the grass is a lot greener on the other side, even though there is no more grass🥲. At least I’m saving a lot of money on weed and hospital bills!