u/katzie__

Recently I made a super long post about my experience trying different cups with vaginismus. I was at the end of my period today and decided to give the Lily cup a second chance.

That was a mistake.

You see that no-spill internal rim? That bad boy suctioned itself onto my cervix. I thought I’d had a successful go with the cup and pushed on the spine to break the suction initially. Unfortunately this pushed the remaining air out, squishing the cup down to the perfect size to sit around my cervix.

My period had basically stopped by then - if this was earlier in the cycle, I’m sure the blood flow would have helped it unseal. But absolutely nothing was working, it was properly vacuum sealed, so I had to go to urgent care. Several hours later, having been passed between UC, A&E and a surgical ward (😳) a gynaecologist got it out with forceps. No lasting damage but my cervix is very sore!

My cup is now in the bin - she asked if I wanted it back but I had no intention of using it again! I’m willing to go back to the cups that had been working, but I will NEVR use a cup without suction holes after this.

Pictured left to right: Lily A, Lily One, Saalt Teen, Mooncup beginner/Nüdie teen
Below: Saalt Small

So this is going to be a brief story of my journey to using a cup with vaginismus, plus a review of each cup. Strap in (or suction in, I suppose) because this is going to be a loooong one!

Background
Several years ago I was looking for ways to reduce waste and discovered reusable period products. I tried reusable pads and liked them, but wanted to try the much more convenient-sounding cup. After seeing that it had great reviews, I purchased the Saalt small - the pictured blue cup.

Now, bear in mind that I had never used a tampon and was very much a virgin, but what could possibly go wrong? Well, dear reader, it turned out that absolutely nothing would go inside me. It was as if there wasn’t even a hole. Nothing. Nada. If it wasn’t for the several years of periods I’d already had, if you’d told me that I just didn’t have a vagina I would have believed you.

Fast forward to the present, and I’ve had pelvic floor physio for vaginismus. I can dilate to around the diameter of a small menstrual cup, and I really wanted to make it work. Reusable pads and period underwear are great, but I don’t always enjoy the bulk or the damp sensation. I figured that I’d need something much softer and thinner than my Saalt cup to be able to insert it comfortably. I knew my cervix was on the higher end, and Lily Cup’s “folds as small as a tampon” branding was very enticing, so I ordered one.

As you can tell from the three additional cups, I didn’t settle with that one, but I have found two(!) that actually work for me. Yes, these are quite a few cups purchased in a short space of time, but I have the means and a very unpredictable & changing vagina, so I’m hoping I can get use out of most of them later down the line. Here are my reviews:

Intimina Lily Cup (A)
Diameter: 40mm
Firmness: 2(PACII), 4(Period Nirvana)

Super soft and folded much thinner than my Saalt. I thought this would be the one at first. I received this whilst on my period and decided to give it an initial insert-and-remove test before relying on it.

Now, my vaginismus means that insertion takes time (and lube). It took me quite a lot of attempts to insert this, but once it was in, it opened up, suctioned quickly into place and felt relatively comfortable. Success! I had a shower and then tried to get it out again.

Oh boy.

This was SO difficult. Side note: I can’t fit two fingers inside to pinch the base of the cup, so for all of these I’ve been using the ‘hook and drag’ method: push a finger up: hook it over the rim to break the suction and drag the cup down and out. The issue with the Lily was that:
A) it had instantly snuggled up higher, making it harder to reach.
B) sometimes I’d hook a finger over and not feel like the suction had broken.
C) the cup was so wide inside my pesky canal that it was painful to fit both the cup and a finger. The rim was firmer than the body (hence the two different firmness ratings), so pushing it to get a finger past put a lot of internal pressure on me and triggered my symptoms.

It took me a very painful 15 minutes (and lots of lube) to remove it. I figured it just wasn’t going to work for me with that cup and looked into other options, which led me to…

Intimina Lily Cup One
Diameter: 39mm
Firmness: 1(PACII), 4(PN)

AKA Not The One.

I was rather surprised at the large discrepancy in firmness ratings. I knew I needed a soft cup, but decided to trust PACII on this occasion. After all, the Lily One was described as a total beginner cup..! Spoiler: this was a mistake.

Looking back, I don’t know how I inserted it. I’ve tried several times since, and once the rim is inside me I’ve nope’d out immediately and pulled it straight out because it’s so painful.

The rim is SO much firmer than the body. I appreciate that it helps the cup to pop open, but the one time I had to remove it after fully inserting it it felt like the rim was tearing my vaginal opening because it was so firm. Since the body is much softer than the rim, I imagine that pinching the base (if I could do that) wouldn’t be particularly effective in breaking the suction.

Side note: so far I’ve used “soft” to mean “squishable”. However, if we take it to mean “smooth to touch”, the original Lily is so much softer than the Lily One. Lily One feels like it’s made of a cheaper silicone. I suppose this is to allow it to collapse into the case, but it does change the user experience.

Saalt Teen
Diameter: 37.7mm
Firmness: 3(PACII), 2(PN)

I’d had bad experiences with both Intimina products. Part of me thought that perhaps using a cup just wasn’t going to work for me, but I also didn’t want to write it off, since both of the Intimina cups were fairly non-standard. I decided to give it one last try with a super small, soft, and average-shaped cup.

Enter the Saalt Teen. Immediately this looked more promising. It was a lovely soft silicone and the rim was no different to the body of the cup (hooray!).

This was such a pleasant experience in comparison to the Lilies. The Saalt teen goes in so smoothly with just a little lube. Removal is harder than I’d like, purely because it’s such a short cup and always shifts itself up. However, despite it sitting fairly near my cervix, it takes significantly less time and pain to remove compared to the previous two. It’s still painful, but it doesn’t feel like my vagina needs a whole day off to recover this time!

I even went swimming with it! This is the first time I’ve been able to use an insertable while swimming, so this was a MASSIVE win for me.

I figured this was the cup for me! I’d stick with it until my vaginismus allowed me to size up, and deal with the removal discomfort. After all, there was no miracle cup available in the UK that was equally tiny and soft, but longer than the Saalt. Was there?

Mooncup Beginner Teen / &Sisters Nüdie Teen (same product - MCUK purchased &Sisters I believe?)
Diameter: 38mm
Firmness: 1(PACII & PN)

Okay, I didn’t need another cup. But it was on sale when I discovered it, and it seemed like it was everything I was looking for!

The silicone is SUPER squishy. It went in just as easily as the Saalt Teen. The total length is actually slightly shorter than the Saalt, but it has a longer body and I like the pebble end rather than a long stem.

I didn’t think my body would let me find a cup that I could use pain free, but this is it. It’s soft enough that it folds super small, it opens surprisingly easily, and the suction isn’t as strong which makes removal super simple. This is actually the first cup that I can sometimes insert two fingers (!!) to remove, I think because it’s so soft it doesn’t trigger my symptoms. It also sits lower in me which helps. Unlike the Saalt teen, because I have no issue removing it I can actually empty it at work. This is needed because the capacity is so small (18ml)!

Now, this cup has one major issue: it leaks like crazy. Understandable, because it’s so soft that I imagine any muscle movements will affect its placement. I did consider if it’s even worth using the cup, given I have to use backup, and that still gathers lots of blood. But my reasons for using it anyway are:

1. Most of the blood is going in the cup, so there’s far less chance of ‘oxidised blood’ smell.

2. I use cloth pads, so I’m not using disposables. This way I only have a couple of liners or a pair of period pants to clean each day, not multiple pads soaked thick with old smelly blood!

3. I see this cup as a ‘training cup’. Hopefully I’ll be able to use something firmer and bigger once I’ve had more time to get used to it.

I use the Nudie as my main cup, and switch to the Saalt when running or swimming because it’s just a smidge firmer. Now, these won’t be my ‘forever’ cups. The Saalt Teen is too short and the Mooncup beginner is too leaky. I hope to be able to go back to the Lily A and give it another try in a few months time. If that doesn’t work out, then whilst I don’t really want to buy another cup, once I can tolerate a larger diameter then maybe the Saalt Soft small?

I wanted to make this partly to give some reviews from the perspective of someone who’s recovering from quite significant vaginismus, but also because using a cup has been a massive goal for me. Even though I’m having a very imperfect experience, I feel like I’ve achieved something huge <3