I'm so tired..
Hi everyone.
For as long as I can remember I've been a picky eater. I'm in my 30s now and all I eat is junk food, more or less. My parents would always nag me to eat everything and family dinner parties was a nightmare. I would get made fun of for not liking the food, which my cosins would eat, who was younger than me. My younger sister was even worse with eating than me. I say was, because she ended her life years ago. I didn't really realize that we were both struggling with a lot the same issues before it was too late. I never go out, attend social events or any gathering at all, if food is involved. Due to my eating, I''m overweight and struggle with my stomach a lot. Sometimes I have to run 4-5 times in a row after eating. This adds another layer of avoidance when it comes to social gatherings. Even if I like the food that is being served in a social situation, I don't go, due to my fear and anxiety around my stomach. I'm unemployed currently, and have no motation to find another job. I had a job, but they let me go. I would always eat alone with my own food during lunch break, so I never really bonded with anyone at work. Furthermore, my bathroom issue makes me stay at home, a lot. I barely go outside, as the stress I feel of not having a bathroom close freaks me out. My own mind is my worst enemy and I don't know what to do. I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired. Story over, I just needed to get it out. Thanks for reading!