u/puppalov3r

How much time is everyone dedicating to their NICU baby?

I have a 20 month old and a 2 week old NICU baby.
The hospital is 25 minutes away from home and I go there every day in the morning and do 2 hours of kangaroo and then do diaper change, pump my boobs and hang out for maybe 30 mins.

My husband then goes in the evening whilst I care for our other child and does the same routine.

We own our own business so don’t get maternity/paternity leave and also live abroad, away from family so don’t have evening childcare.

Are we spending enough time with him? Right now he’s just sleeping so I don’t feel as guilty leaving but I fear when he has longer wake windows I’ll have quilt having to leave to do other things.

I know everyone’s situation is different but I feel like we are the parents who are there the least.

I’m looking for advice on how you felt more connected to your baby in NICU? My baby was born at 31 weeks. He is now 2 weeks old.

I’m struggling to feel like I have a baby. I’m pumping and delivering milk for him. I go and do kangaroo and help with diaper changes but overall I just feel like I’m providing a service rather than being a mum.

How did you find ways to humanise the situation and help to make it feel like you’re a parent?

This is my second child and I thought that the connection would come quicker this time but I also wasn’t anticipating an early arrival and the current situation.

Any tips will be greatly appreciated 🥰