u/satanicpedanticpanic

I (29) have a college degree in something I have no interest in anymore. I graduated during the pandemic, got into food service, and have been there ever since.

I know my position is dead end, but I make enough to only have to work part time, and have also accumulated a good amount of savings. But I hate it so much. It’s so physically and emotionally exhausting, and I know I can’t do it forever.

I was recently diagnosed with a disorder that makes it very difficult for me to be on my feet for long periods of time, which adds extra strain when I’m at my job. One of my friends has hit me up with a few corporate job opportunities, but the idea of working everyday, 7 to 5, with two free days a week makes me sick to my stomach.

I have hobbies that I get really into, but they always fizzle out, usually after I’ve spent a good amount of money on them. Really what I want to do is make short films, but I don’t know how I’d even begin. AND I can’t tell if it’s something that actually interests me, or just a hobby that I’d blow 1000+ dollars on before getting frustrated to the point of quitting.

It really feels like I can’t get a grip. Either I work five days a week at a bullshit nothing job, or I stay home depressed and overwhelmed at my ‘potential opportunities’ until I burn out and the cycle of existential exhaustion repeats.

But I have money, and a job, and family and friends. So what the hell is wrong with me where I can’t be satisfied?

Question for fellow sufferers of PD! I have never dealt with PD before, and have always had fairly smooth skin, however for the past two months, I have had the worst skin flare up ever, and I was completely stuck until I found this subreddit and connected the dots.

Ironically enough, I was also just diagnosed with POTS, though I’ve been feeling the symptoms for about six months now. Does anyone else have dysauto dysfunctions? If so, have you ever noticed a relationship between the two? Are there specific things you watch out for that trigger your PD?

Honestly, the POTS is making my life hell enough. I’ve had to cut back my work availability because I can’t be on my feet for very long. My job is very customer facing, so the days I am there, I have to wear makeup. I have a dermatologist appointment scheduled, but it’s a month out 🥲 Any advice is appreciated, I just want to feel pretty again.