I still can’t decide on MD vs PhD
Hello,
I’m a rising senior at a small liberal arts college majoring in biochemistry. I came in undecided about whether I wanted to pursue the PhD or MD route, and it appears I’m leaving that way too!
I had a research internship at my college last summer, and I had so much fun working in the lab. I loved designing experiments and pursuing my own curiosities, despite the monotonies and “hiccups” that come with research projects. I’m passionate about problem-solving and applying techniques developed in molecular biology and biochemistry to further investigate living systems. I’ve also enjoyed my coursework in biochemistry, molecular biology, genetics, and orgo (well, just Orgo I though). I’m going to pursue a senior thesis in the same lab and will likely take a gap year or two devoted to research.
However, I’m not sure to what extent I enjoy research itself versus this particular lab environment. The people in this lab have been very sweet and collaborative, especially compared to the pre-med community at my school. I took an EMT course during our J-term and absolutely despised the competitive nature of the course, as well as the fast-paced, hands-on nature of the work. I passed the psychomotor exam but was ambivalent about taking the NREMT for years. I finally took it and failed—oops. I didn’t enjoy learning about much besides pharmacology, and even that felt fairly superficial. I also took an animal physiology course at school but ended up taking it pass/fail because I couldn’t motivate myself to study. I’m much more interested in molecular mechanisms of disease than in anatomy.
That said, I love taking care of people, and I think direct patient interaction could be an invaluable aspect of my career. My dad is in remission now, but he previously had stage III Non-Hodgkin lymphoma, so he frequently saw his hematologist-oncologist. I found it fascinating that he improved through a clinical trial involving a new immunotherapy, and it made me think about how cool it would be to work in translational medicine. I’ve also spoken with a pediatric hematologist-oncologist, and I could picture myself in her shoes: applying principles of basic science to help kids feel better. I also love working with kids, so I think I could enjoy her job despite the immense hardships.
If I worked in medicine, I think I’d want to pursue academic medicine because of the protected research time. I spent time shadowing a family medicine physician and an endocrinologist in community practice, and I was honestly pretty bored (sorry). However, I’m not sure whether pursuing an MD is worth it if I’d ultimately want to devote most of my time to researching or developing novel therapies, especially given the time and money required to obtain the degree. At the same time, I worry about waking up one day and realizing I made the wrong decision by pursuing a PhD—that I sacrificed the clinical aspect of my career and lost the ability to directly treat patients.
What attracts me to the MD is the breadth of options: you can do research as an MD, but you can’t treat patients with only a PhD. There’s also the job security. That said, I think a PhD aligns more closely with my values of autonomy and creativity. I also hate waking up early (before 9 a.m.), and I think the residency lifestyle and long hours in medicine might wreck me. If I pursued the PhD route, I’d be interested in roles in biotech or pharma. I also think teaching is fun—I enjoyed my years TAing and tutoring—but the competitive nature of academia scares me.
I care a lot about maintaining a happy, healthy lifestyle where I have time to travel, hike, read recreationally, and raise a family, so I’m wondering whether the PhD route might be more conducive to that than the MD route.
Apologies for the long-ass post, but I’d love to hear from anyone who faced a similar dilemma and how they ultimately decided what path to pursue. MD-PhD could potentially be an option, but spending so many additional years in school doesn’t sound especially appealing, particularly if most MD-PhDs end up primarily using one degree more than the other.
What questions should I be asking myself?
What should my next steps be?
Is it normal not to know what I want?
What is the lifestyle like in biotech/pharma?
Any career regrets?
Thank you :)