u/tikitaka_martin

I am in my mid-50s and work in the data related field. My LinkedIn profile gets poached by vendors every day:

• "Hey John, saw you work on data" - yes, it is in my experience
• "Hi is this John?" - on my personal phone call while I am on vacation
• Connection request with a pitch attached

They all just want "15 minutes" of my time. I am talking 2 or 3 a day ok? do the math. My job IS NOT to talk to vendors. There is a group of people that does that. Pitching me is like trying to sell a yacht to a goldfish.

And now, I am noting the new closer:

• "Please let me know for yes or no"
• "Even a no works"

Oh, even a no works! this is a tactic to engage you in conversation. You try to be polite but it is a never ending story unless you stop it.

When I started my career, you did not walk up to someone's desk hand them a brochure and demand them to verbally reject you. That was understood to be insane behavior. Now it is a LinkedIn growth tactic.

So Reddit community, AITA for treating these like the spam they are? Or have I finally become the old man yelling at the cloud (the cloud being sales people)?

Hey r/sideproject,

I'm a one-person serial founder 😄. Every time I named a side project I'd waste a week on USPTO TESS, Porkbun, and ten browser tabs of language Wiktionary lookups.

Then I'd take it to my IP attorney who'd find a phonetic-similar mark on a sound-alike I'd never heard of and we'd start over.

So I stitched the checks an IP attorney actually runs into one automated pass. It's called Klombic. Tier-graduated checks — Quick ($9.99 / 3 candidates), Starter ($13.99 / 5), Premium ($19.99 / 10). One PDF in 4 hours.

What it actually does:

• USPTO TESS exact-string scrape (live + dead marks)
• Multi-TLD domain availability (.com first, falls back to .io / .app / .co)
• Cross-language collision scan (15+ languages — catches the "this is a slur in Russian" surprise)
• Abercrombie distinctiveness analysis (Generic → Descriptive → Suggestive → Arbitrary → Fanciful)
• Trademark-extension exposure in adjacent IC classes
• Sound-symbolism + memorability scoring (Klink, Yorkston-Menon — papers cited)
• Handles + dev-namespace + app-store sweep across 14 platforms
• Premium adds focused per-language scan with replicated quorum (catches regional slang the broad scan misses), phonetic-similar §2(d) screening, common-law sweep

What I'm explicit about:

It's signal, not legal clearance. The goal is to make the conversation with your USPTO attorney 10× shorter, not replace them. Every report says so.

What I'd love feedback on:

• The pricing ($9.99 / $13.99 / $19.99 — am I underpricing?)
• The refund policy: no refunds, but every order includes a 14-day attorney-test window with one free re-run if any name doesn't survive your lawyer's review. Was the right call vs money-back, but curious if anyone disagrees.

Sample report (no signup, real PDF I generated when picking my own brand): klombic.com

Honestly excited to ship. Built it because I needed it. Would love any feedback or war stories about naming.