u/wildcardstraight

Hi.

Every so often, I think back to a conversation I had with a college professor right before I graduated. He asked me where I saw myself in 10 years. Without thinking, I immediately said, “Married with kids.” He chuckled, remarking that normally when he asked that question students would talk about grad school or their careers.

Now, I didn’t follow that timeline, though the desire for a family exists deep within me, down to my bones. I took a winding path to this present moment, learning about myself, becoming more confident expressing my needs/feelings, and setting boundaries.

I’m ready to date with the intention of it leading to marriage. I can’t think of anything more fulfilling than being a stay at home mom and cultivating a warm, cozy, and nurturing environment.

The life I’d love to create with you

• I want to build a solid, healthy partnership rooted in trust and respect. And joy and silliness and growth and understanding and forgiveness.
• As a team, we create a safe space to express what we’re feeling openly and honestly.
• We cook together or I’ll make you dinner. Our home is regularly filled with the smell of fresh-baked bread.
• Trips to zoos and aquariums and camping trips and dinner dates and watching shitty movies (okay, good movies sometimes, too.)
• A focus on best intentions, not perfection.
• Regularly expressing that we value and appreciate each other.
• A strong commitment to our relationship and family, even in tough or challenging times. Let’s be each other’s biggest cheerleaders and supporters.
• A beautifully intimate relationship where we know each other deeply.
• Communication/treating each other in the kind, honest manner that ensures our relationship would never end up in an AITAH-type sub.

What I’m looking for

• A masculine partner who is a fierce protector of his family. You make the decisions for the most part (taking my thoughts into consideration), and likely have a gun collection.
• You have the financial resources to support a family.
• You understand that growth is rarely linear. Often, growth involves taking 3 steps forward, 1 step back, 2 steps forward, 3 steps back…
• All the wholesomeness! You’re not looking to rush into sex. You know that trust and safety are important components of good sex.
• You’re handy and know how to fix things (or look it up.) You’re pragmatic about what you can handle by yourself vs. hiring a professional.
• You have a strong emotional intelligence and value vulnerability. I want to tell you about my childhood and fears and insecurities and feel seen, understood, and valued.

A few things about me

• I work as a UX content designer, though I’d love to quit my job and take care of a home instead :)
• No kids (though I teach pre-natal yoga a couple times a month), never been married.
• Over the past few years, I’ve been exploring my femininity. I spent time thinking I needed to do my nails and makeup to be feminine, but I realized that’s not true. Don’t get me wrong: I think my femininity is really important (along with your masculinity), though I’ve become more confident in defining what that means for me. And that most often involves natural nails and face. My femininity is rooted in my warm, soft presence.
• I’m 5’0” and I have black hair. I have brown eyes, I wear glasses, and freckles dance across my nose and cheeks.
• My love language (receiving) is words of affirmation.
• I’m delightfully weird. And I want to make weird art. Like a dance video where eggs get thrown at me or me writhing in mud.
• I'm really proud of a solo show I wrote and performed. I think self-expression is really important.
• I’m open to location, though if things go well, I’d want to meet soon. Generally, I'm looking for someone between 28-45, but if you think we'd get along and you're outside that range, feel free to shoot me a note!

If this feels like a full body yes…

Send me a message and tell me what you liked about my ad and a little about you. It'd be a plus if you record a little audio note, perhaps with some compliments tucked in there :)

Looking forward to hearing from you!

p.s. Here's a voice memo I recorded today.

p.p.s. I've been searching for a long time. I think there's something important—and magical, too—about timing. I'm looking to meet the right person at the right time. Like, our experiences have prepared us to have a really special relationship, where we just get each other and have fun road trips with delightful side quests and the best snacks (I recently went on a road trip to Detroit for an improv festival and I got snacks from Trader Joe's. I loved the garlic butter irish potato chips.)

p.p.p.s. Hopefully, our relationship involves more than road trips 😂 Road trips just popped into my mind as I was writing.

p.p.p.p.s. A big thing I think about is discernment...what is intuition? Are my impulses coming from a true inner knowing or fear? How do I fully trust myself and act from that place of trust?