r/Bar

I (m22) have never been to a bar. I guess that’s technically a lie, I’ve been IN 2-3 bars, but I’ve never been to THE bar or had a drink out in public before. I have ADHD and Autism, I have no friends or family, and I don’t even really drink alcohol if I’m being honest, I usually prefer to light up. I’ve always wanted to go to a bar before and order a drink or two, maybe make some friends, or maybe even just as an excuse to get out of the house, I live in the middle of nowhere with nothing to do for miles. I don’t have anyone to show me “how to do it” and at my age, I feel like I’d look stupid walking in and “flagging down” the bartender and saying “I’ve never been to a bar and I don’t know what to do.” The few times I’ve been in, I’ve only ever seen a menu once, and it didn’t have prices listed. Alcohol at the store is stupendously expensive, and I’ve seen in like TV and Movies that “$4 dollar shots” is a really good deal… you’re telling me 4 bucks for a little sip of alcohol is a steal? How much is an actual drink that would make me feel anything cost??? People call me cheap for asking how much stuff is before I order, but I can’t afford to spend $20 on a literal cup of liquid that I’m gonna piss out in a few hours after getting a little buzz. Can I just sit anywhere? How does a “tab” work? Honestly, tabs are what have me tripped up the most and have me the most anxious about this whole thing. I feel so stupid. I’m typing this with my burner account and I just feel like an idiot and I don’t even want to go anymore. There’s so many things that people “just know” and I just don’t. I feel like I missed a class in school that taught everything else that I’m missing. I don’t want to be laughed at because I just don’t know how bars work, so I’m here asking what to do. Assume it’s my first day on earth, walk me through going to a bar and ordering a drink and paying for it. And please don’t laugh. It’s an experience I’ve always wanted to experience, at least just once.