r/Cougars_Den

I’m in my mid-20s and recently went out with a woman about 20 years older than me. It was my first time dating someone with that big of an age gap, and I honestly enjoyed it way more than I expected.

We had great chemistry, the sex was great, and she seemed genuinely into me. During the date she mentioned more than once that she wanted to see me again. Afterward she kept texting me very flirtatiously, told me she couldn’t stop thinking about me, and was talking about seeing each other again.

We made plans for a few days later and she even confirmed them the day of. Everything seemed completely normal. Then a few hours later she suddenly stopped responding. No cancellation, explanation, argument, or obvious change in energy beforehand. Just gone.

That’s the part I don’t understand. If she had become distant right after we slept together, I’d assume she just wanted a one-time thing. But she continued pursuing me afterward and literally confirmed our plans before disappearing.

So cougars, what would make you do a sudden 180 like that with a younger guy? Second thoughts about the age difference? Just wanted the experience? Someone else? Or probably something completely unrelated to the age gap?

Either way, I apparently discovered something about myself because I enjoyed the whole older-woman dynamic way too much 😂 I think she got me addicted. I’ll definitely be looking for cougars again.

I’ve recently been pursuing the cougar/cub lifestyle in Southern California as a cub. Living where I’m at, it feels like it should lead to different and varied experiences across the board.

My issue is that the women I’ve gone out with communicate not wanting too many upfront comments on their appearance or physicality to not feel sexualized or like a fetish (which I can completely understand).

However, with multiple women now after meeting in person, they seem to quickly turn the conversation towards looks or sexual conversations. While I’m fine with this, how can I navigate the conversations without stepping on their boundaries? Appreciate any and all advice.

It seems we are having an influx of new members posting seeking ads.

Please read the rules and FAQs (wiki tab at the top of the sub).

This sub does not allow seeking contact messages. We have another sub for that.

Read through the posts we get so many similar posts to:

* Where do I meet older women?

* What makes a younger man attractive to an older woman?

These posts quickly become monotonous and in an effort to keep the sub "fresh" please do some research in here first before asking. The FAQS also have a huge amount of information shared over the last 8 ish years by our members.

Welcome 🤗