r/Wakingupapp

Andrew seems like a really great guy, and I enjoyed listening to him, but a lot of the material covered is really technical, to an extent that is deeper than usual with other guests.

I could wrap my head around the basics (for example the different viewpoints of Advaita and Buddhism), but the topics they get into (different flavours of nondual wisdom, "consciousness is a derogatory term in some traditions", "rigpa does not arise" etc),
leaves me feeling like a five-year old trying to understand special relativity.

I have a chaotic life with 3 kids, but I always try to return to stillness amid the chaos throughout the day. My life is actually a good testing ground. I don't think I'm awakened, but my reactivity and sense of self / status etc. has decreased noticeably over the past years since I started practicing.

So when they mention really technical stuff or recognitions that can only be attained after long retreats (which are not accessible to me, I don't even have a teacher), it leaves me feeling helpless and disenchanted with the whole project, like unless one dedicates their life to this, they will never really get to truly recognise their true nature. Does anyone else ever feel like this?

Okay Reddit, hear me out.
I was out in Alaska on a family cruise, and while I was out at sea, I meditated really deeply. Like, I went all in.
Then I woke up one morning and genuinely felt like something had shifted. I was looking at the world differently. I was looking at people differently. I felt more self-aware, more peaceful, and suddenly a lot of things just… made sense.
It was such a strange experience because nothing around me had changed, but my perception of everything had changed.
For a little while, it honestly felt like I had woken up in an alternate universe but in the best possible way.

Has anyone else ever experienced something like this after deep meditation? Btw this was during the eclipse week

Some people are more predisposed to forgive their own downfalls compared to the downfalls of others and some people are the exact opposite. With increased awareness its possible that this gap in compassion increases significantly, not because you necessarily hate one party more than the other, but because you develop compassion for one party more than the other because its much easier. In reality there is no "self" for there to be an "other", so having a brain that functions in this way is synonymous with suffering. For example, if you are able to have more compassion for yourself naturally and this issue arises as your awareness clarifies there can be a very subtle sociopathy that can develop whereas the opposite case might be associated with more depression and anxiety.

Let's say I have only two options ahead.

Option A would lead to maximum happiness for myself but maximum suffering for everyone else. Option B would lead maximum suffering for myself but maximum happiness for everyone else.

Which option should I choose?

As per the thesis, I should choose B (as I understand it).

However, there's one problem, that I don't understand.

Here's Sam's quote from his podcast Facts and Values.

>

Let's say I chose A (happiness for myself, suffering for others) instead of B (suffering for myself, happiness for others).

Applying his logic: since caring about A isn't compatible with peak flourishing, the "requisite changes" in my brain would eventually make me see that caring about A was a mistake, wrong in the sense that I didn't know what I was missing.

Now, what am I missing, If I chose A? ... I'd be missing immense misery that B would lead on the other side.

I am struggling to understand how Sam's claim "you didn't know what you were missing" applies in this situation. What exactly is the thing that my changed perspective would reveal to me that I cannot currently see?

I would appreciate any clarification.